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WD40: Who Knew?
Submitted by Anonymous
July 26, 2013, 7 Comments

I work at a doggie daycare and step in dog poop all the time. So do my co-workers. We wanted to share our favorite way to clean our shoes with you ... it's WD40! Even if the poop you step in manages to work itself into the sole design on your shoe, WD40 can clean it out. Here's what we do to...

The Uritonnoir: A Male Concert-Goer
Submitted by daphne
May 7, 2013, 8 Comments

If you've ever been to an outdoor concert, then you have most likely waited in line to pee in a smelly, and oft'-filthy, porta-potty. If you're a guy, then you may have decided to pee elsewhere: behind the porta-potty, at the edge of the field, in the parking lot, on someone else's shoes, etc....

The Vasalva Maneuver And Diabetes: Reci
Submitted by daphne
March 28, 2013, 4 Comments

This week, someone I know told me that he recently discovered that his friend's diabetic boss had died on the toilet. I offered my condolences, hung up the phone after our conversation, and immediately ran to my laptop to conduct research on diabetes and toilet deaths. I turned to my Olde...

Give me a hand: Just make sure you wash
Submitted by Dr. Poonami
December 15, 2012, 6 Comments

It's not hard to wash a hand, and it’s even easier to wash a bum. Hand and water bum-washing is the everyday toilet ritual for most of the world’s population. But since toilet paper first came into popular use over a century ago, the rest of the world seems to have totally lost sight of any other...

Drinking Magnesium Citrate
Submitted by Anonymous
August 25, 2012, 14 Comments

There's nothing I like better than a good poop story. Unfortunately with the subject of having to drink magnesium citrate, while it makes me laugh at what people have to go through to have a poop baby, it also pains me knowing what the stuff tastes like. I have had to drink magnesium citrate...

Poop, Wipe, And Flush In Less Than 25 Se
Submitted by Anonymous
August 20, 2012, 10 Comments

I once managed a 12.659-second poop, including wiping, when I blew my nose while on the toilet. The sneeze forced it right out. And it was a clean one wiper. What's your fastest time?

A Good Home
Submitted by debbiedespoo
January 10, 2012, 11 Comments

Though I am still a young woman, I have worked in a few offices in my early career and eaten in many fast food establishments. Generally I have found that the standard of cleanliness is not too bad in these places, but some places, especially fast food restaurants, leave a lot to be desired. I...

Introducing The GoStool
Submitted by daphne
October 21, 2010, 11 Comments

For years we’ve read about the benefits of squatting to poop as opposed to sitting. There is less straining, a lower chance of hemorrhoids, and the colon straightens out when a person puts his butt closer to his feet. Well, if you are not one of those “wiry little fuckers” who is built to squat (...

The Princess, The Bouncer, And The Ballo
Submitted by Recovering Stinker
June 29, 2010, 26 Comments

I posted on here a while back about my own situation on the page My Butt is Leaky, but that was a few years ago. My condition has improved, so I thought I would repost some new thoughts. Let me tell you briefly about my situation. I very, very rarely had any noticeably visible leakage; however, I...

Misadventures In Butt Shaving
Submitted by craigslistclassics
November 23, 2009, 102 Comments

Editor's Note: Thank you, Chief Thunderbutt, for setting the record strait. This is a reprint from craigslist classics. Good detective work! I have recently made a mistake in my life and I offer my story to all, though it is tasteless, so that you may learn from my error. It all started, as...

The Retention Prevention Stretch
Submitted by IBS NO MORE
August 20, 2009, 32 Comments

Very often, at the end of an IBS attack, I am left with what feels like a pebble-sized turdlet stuck just inside the hoop. This has caused more cursing and excess wiping and raw bunghole issues than I care to admit, as the idea of sticking a finger or anything else up there to get it out is just...

Submitted by turtle
July 31, 2009, 42 Comments

For as long as I remember, I have suffered from IBS with constipation. I eat a healthy, vegetarian diet loaded with whole grains, fiber, and things that should make my colon quiver with joy. But, alas, I have a lazy colon. While it refuses to recognize when the cannons are loaded, it demands...

A Load Of Horse Shit
Submitted by Anonymous
July 9, 2009, 19 Comments

Back in 2000-2001, I owned a horse. Her name was Jubilee and she was a long-held dream that finally became reality. She was a lot of work, but she was worth it. She was also the creator of several interesting situations. You know, poop-wise. One nice thing was that Jubilee would give plenty of...

The Peril Of The Red Meat Diet
Submitted by Legin
June 11, 2009, 30 Comments

A number of years ago, I began experimenting with an all-red meat diet. For about two months, I ate nothing but hamburgers, chili, and the occasional sloppy joe. (All homemade, by the way.) At first I noticed that things were getting constipated, but I didn't think anything of it. But then, one...

The Deliverance Cure To Constipation
Submitted by spudnutsncoffee
June 2, 2009, 42 Comments

As a rule, I am a pretty optimistic guy. I like to smile a lot, laugh a lot, and people generally like me. At least, that's how my psychiatrist likes to describe me. Still, I like to have enjoyable moments. We all do, don't we? I mean, what's life without joy, right? Well, life without joy is...

The Dracula Solution To Hemorrhoids
Submitted by QB
May 28, 2009, 76 Comments

Editor's note: I don't have hemorrhoids. But after reading this email, I kind of wish I did so that I could try this remedy out. I know that one of you good people reading this right now is suffering from the pain of piles. Please, for the sake of inflamed ringpieces everywhere, try this out and...

Timing Is Everything
Submitted by Tower Of Shit
May 11, 2009, 27 Comments

I found the secret to the perfect shit, my newly-found friends, and I feel it is my duty to share the good news. I believe that it is all about TIMING. Now I will try to explain why. From the first methane dew dripping out of your ass until the final explosive decompression, a few milestones...

When It Is Okay To Shit Your Pants: Requ
Submitted by Pill Pooper
April 9, 2009, 187 Comments

It had been a long day. My helper Matty and I had spent the day installing an alarm in an old shit-box of a house, which isn't uncommon. It's the nature of the business, I suppose. We do a lot of subcontracting work and most the jobs we do are the freebies all the big alarm companies give out...

The Soothing Virtues of Nivea Cold Cream
Submitted by El Scumbag
January 30, 2009, 79 Comments

In my salad days, I spent a lot of time in Sheffield (which, for the information of you Americans, is an industrial city in the north of England). It was my frequent pleasure to get beastly drunk on the fine local ale, followed by a curry on the way home. However, when one is in the company of...

The Lav Of My Life: The Public Toilet Th
Submitted by johnknoefler
November 10, 2008, 16 Comments

Back in the early 1980's, I was a young high school dropout with a baby and a very angry wife. So I decided to go to a trade school and learn welding. I lived out in Beaumont, California; the trade school I decided on was in Los Angeles, about ninety minutes away. Of course, I could barely afford...

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