Netvibes For Poop: Berlin Veterinarians Find Dogs Getting High On Drug User Feces

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PoopReport of the Year AwardSite AdminComment Content ModeratorComment Quality Moderatore 6000+ pointsf 5000+ pointsg 4000+ pointsh 3000+ pointsi 2000+ pointsj 1000+ pointsk 500+ pointsl 100+ pointsm 1+ points - Newb
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In case you did not know, iGoogle is shutting down in a few days. As a loyal fan to the little fox in the Teahouse theme, I was very sad to hear the news. Yes, I can keep my Gmail account open to see the theme, but it would be nice to find a new browser home page that hosted the theme. It was during a search for a new homepage and organizer that I stumbled across Netvibes. This device application allows the user to collect information on different topics or interests by simply typing those interests into a search bar. Better, Netvibes allows the user to link all of his or her devices: computers, laptops, tablets, iPods, and even phones.

Even though I found Netvibes originally as a new supporter of the Fox Teahouse theme, I quickly realized that I could use the application for poop news. I went to the Netvibes English homepage and clicked the "Get Started" under the "I'm just me" option. Doing so took me to this page here, where I clicked "Get Started" under the Basic option. When I did, a mini screen appeared asking me to enter a topic I'd like to track. I typed "poop" and clicked on "Dashboard It." Finally, I was asked to pick a thumbnail for personalization (I chose the cute little poopie cartoon). And there it is now -- a entire, self-updating search result page on poop. News, videos, blogs ... my new poop page offers me poop on these and other types of media, all of which I can configure, add to, or delete from.

So what's happening today on the internet involving poop, according to Netvibes? We're being told that despite Chinese food vendors have been caught using sewage-tainted gutter oil to fry food for human consumption, we should not cancel our travel plans. I can also click on a video to see a baby's poop face and read a discussion between two people on a forum about pooping at a significant other's house.

The story that caught my eye today the most, however, involved our best friends: dogs. Pet owners from Berlin are mortified to find that their four-legged companions are getting sick from human poop left at their local dog parks. According to veterinarian Reinhold Sassnau, dogs are being brought in shaking, unable to sleep or ambulate, severely dehydrated, and presenting with rapid heartbeats. When tested, their blood shows positive for heroin, and the source of the heroin is drug user poop.

The dogs all were visitors to local dog parks known to be frequented by drug users, yet the article does not state if the dogs were let off leash or not. I would have to imagine the parks would be off-leash parks, or else I am supposed to believe that Germans stand around and let their dogs eat crap while they watch.

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9 Comments on "Netvibes For Poop: Berlin Veterinarians Find Dogs Getting High On Drug User Feces"

Deja Poo's picture
Comment Quality Moderatorj 1000+ points

Those symptoms -- rapid heartbeat, insomnia, dehydration -- seem more consistent with Methamphetamine than Heroin. That is, of course, unless the dogs are so addicted to drug user poop that they're experiencing serious withdrawal.

Yo quiero Taco Bell.

ericb's picture
Site AdminComment Content ModeratorComment Quality Moderatorm 1+ points - Newb

Dogs are known to like eating poop, possibly due to the nutritional value. People have even talked about the idea of creating poop-flavored dog treats.

The Fecal Falcon's picture
m 1+ points - Newb

Definitely, definitely off-leash parks. I've been in Germany all year, & I promise the Germans are in love with dogs.

Otto von Skidmark's picture
m 1+ points - Newb

Worst job in the world: food scientist responsible for flavour profile of poop-flavoured treats.

Artful Dodger's picture
Comment Quality Moderatorl 100+ points

How long until the junkies realize this is a potential free score and start eating the poop themselves? From there it's just a matter of time until someone starts bagging & reselling it.

G Ras's picture
l 100+ points

Sorry have been a non entity..... ID theft is a fucking bitch and the perps have ruined over 8 yrs of research and have me scrambling to save my existence but also trying to find new words that my boss doesn't understand to explain why I haven't supposedly produced any work in that time. God I am pissed, I believe that the punishment for this should be 10 years underneath the Porta potty.

That aside I had to laugh at Daphs article about the dogs eating human shit and coming up with the shakes barfing and all around fuckedupedness... that cracked me up. First I think the gentleman that talked about the meth was right, they would be so twisted up that you would have to lightly thump them with a baseball bat and drag them home. If it was heroin the next night the dog would grab the lease, jump out the window and walk himself. Meth would certainly twist their noggin but the main side effect from heroin is respiratory depression and the person would have to Drag it home on his skateboard. Dogs eat shit from a dietary deficiency, if your dog eats it you might want to check that out.
I personally don't have to eat shit because my intestines hold onto it so long it comes out pale and nutritionless

Perhaps I am an asshole and so much time has pass you probably won't even read this .... but in my defense.... this site is all about funny stuff that happens to us about shit in the course of everyday living.... and may I say in my story I too got shit

G Ras's picture
l 100+ points

sorry did this with a phone

Perhaps I am an asshole and so much time has pass you probably won't even read this .... but in my defense.... this site is all about funny stuff that happens to us about shit in the course of everyday living.... and may I say in my story I too got shit

ChiefThunderbutt's picture
PoopReport of the Year AwardComment Content ModeratorComment Quality Moderatorf 5000+ points

G Ras,

You have been absent from the site far too long. Please drop around more often, your writing is some of the wittiest ever seen in Poop Report.

I deleted the identical posts of your first comment above and assume that your second post was an explanation of how the multiple postings occurred.

Sorry to hear about the identity theft issue. Luckily I have an identity that no one wants.

If I had two faces do you think I'd be wearing this one?

G Ras's picture
l 100+ points

I have 6 days to decide if my current provider can protect my shit so I will submit a story I promised years ago and will submit a G Ras story that I promised a few years ago.

Perhaps I am an asshole and so much time has pass you probably won't even read this .... but in my defense.... this site is all about funny stuff that happens to us about shit in the course of everyday living.... and may I say in my story I too got shit

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