Poop-Associated Guilt Syndrome (PAGS)

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m 1+ points - Newb
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Editor's note: Skiddy Poo originated this conversation in the PoopReport Forums.


SKIDDY POO:
There really needs to be a label for those who suffer from some sort of poop-related
guilt complex.

I've read about shameless and shameful shitting, but this is beyond that.
This isn't some sort of feeling of embarrassment one has while shitting, it is even
more profound and psychologically twisted than that. It is a deep-rooted complex that
develops over time, leaving its victims feeling guilty and estranged when the topic of
poop is suggested.

This complex affects people to a degree that they cannot talk about
pooping and the mere act of pooping in the presence of others is best described as
traumatic. These are the people you see in public bathrooms (they had no choice), who
leave their stalls red-faced and embarrassed as if they had committed a cardinal sin.
These people are much different from the typical shameless shitter in many ways, the
most obvious being their inability to talk about poop.

They do neither condone nor
denounce poop as a legitimate topic: it's just too painful to bring up. When it is
brought up, they begin acting suspicious and edgy ... a symptom of the other "classic"
internal behavior they have: poop-related anxiety. They quickly change the topic or
remove themselves from the conversation.

How this syndrome is manifested is a
puzzlement to me, but I've seen it in a small minority of my friends (mostly women). I
suspect that the basis fo their guilt has some meta-physical cause -- like they were made
to feel guilty about their poop at an early age. I also have my suspicions that Freud
might have been right about some things and this might just very well be one: perhaps
these poop-fearing people are profoundly "anal retentive" due to some distress they
experienced early during their potty training years. Perhaps not.

Have any of the other PR'ers seen this odd, psychologically twisted Poop-Associated
Guilt Syndrome in others? If so, what are the noticeable hallmarks of their behaviors
that you've noticed?


SKIDDY POO:
Dakota once said: "Some folks here seem to equate taking a dump with molesting kids. The one
is normal and the other is a fucking crime. So relax and enjoy a good dump. Noone who
knows you is going to think bad about you because of it!"

This is a classic characterization the syndrome. He notices it in others, too. I think
this way of thinking is beyond shameful shitting.


BROWN STREAK:
The people I know who dismiss poo talk usually do so saying "that's gross",
"disgusting", "this is not the time or place", etc. so I don't really think it is a
Freudian thing. I just think it has to do with the brown, smelly, gooey, mess that is
shit.

Also, for many of the people I know, the red face after leaving the stall is the
embarassment of having to take a dump away from home, somewhere that isn't really
sanitary. I'm sure everyone, shameful or shameless really prefers to use the commode at
home, but the reality of life is you can't always work things that way.

I wouldn't say that those I know who feel this way "equate taking a dump with molesting
kids". Perhaps it is more like equating taking a dump with how many women feel about
men going to a titty bar -- where they are thinking "ewww how could you like looking at
those sluts? It's disgusting!"


DAKOTA6941:
I think Brown Streak is partly
right. Folks in the western world are taught from an early age that shit is disgusting
and causes disease. Some folks who will openly talk about every detail of their sex
lives get all coy and embarrassed if the topic of dumping comes up. I guess this is a
kinda learned behavior.

Young kids (and I'm from a large family) have no shame at all
about shitting. They'll sit on the pot quite happily talking away and even giving a
fucking running commentary, e.g., "Hey, that was a big one" and only later will their
folks have taught them that you just don't do this kinda thing.

It's also interesting
that couples (married and unmarried) will often do anything in front of each other
except take a shit. I once posted here about how my girlfriend sometimes comes into the
bathroom to do things while I'm on the crapper. I thought that was pretty cool since
most chicks won't do that.

Also, I think that social class and upbringing make a
difference. Most of my co-workers on the construction crew don't seem at all
embarrassed about taking a dump with others around, while white-collar folks are often
real embarrassed about dumping in a restroom if someone else is in a stall. So it's a
real complex subject and it's great that you've analysed it so well!


SKIDDY POO:
I understand the "disgusting" part of poo being a conversation topic that isn't
appropriate at all times (like discussing at lunch that damn puss-filled, itchy bump I
found on my . . . )

The reason I raised the question about this problem is because I have a couple of
friends who find the topic and act of pooping to be distressing. It's wierd. They won't
even say that it's gross or inappropriate. They clam up as if the topic were scraping
up against their inner guilt feelings . . . like it was sinfully "bad".


TRASHCANMAN:
I think it has to do with the whole theory of masking onesself. People have trouble
understanding death, because everyone dies, and no one knows what happens when you do.
It brings us off of the sort of gravy train of immortality. So does pooping. It makes
people feel so small, and insignifigant. There are so many cultural models being forced
down our throat 24/7, and they never show any of them poop. Imagine if every movie had
the stars crapping, or if on baywatch, pam anderson took a daily shit, and people
talked about how she stunk up the crapper every time. I don't think she would be so
sexy then. (hepC doesn't help much either)


BROWN STREAK:
I don't know that taking a shit makes people feel mortal or insignificant. But it
probably is an uncomfortable reminder that they are no better than the animals in at
least one respect.


TRASHCANMAN:
Yeah, I think thats it.


SKIDDY POO:
Interesting phenomenological insights. Poop anxiety = realization of mortality OR =
realization of foodchain status OR manifestation of poop related childhood trauma. I
like them all and they are testable hypotheses. I could develop some surveys to test
out these notions, but the people who are most ashamed about poop might not respond.
Maybe I could mask the survey as some sort of social acclamation scale. I think I'll do
this. Observational science and hypothesis testing meets PR!

Let me know if you are interested in helping with my latest method of procrastinating.
I could post them on the net, so if you have some CGI skills or general thoughts on the
survey, let me know (skiddypoop@yahoo.com).


dave:
Perhaps it has something to do with people's desire to be part of high culture. Like
those people who won't watch TV or listen to pop music... they think poop is so base,
so pedestrian, so populist... its below them to engage in such low culture
conversation. Snobbery, essentially.

I think that can explain some of the aversion, but not the guilt. Thats more
psychological, i'll bet. It goes deeper than shit though --- people who are emberassed
by their bodies, essentially. Shit repression probably stems from the exact same psyche
as sexual repression.


DAKOTA6941:
This is all getting a bit deep for me. I guess the last thing I think about when taking a
shit is dying or where I am in the food chain! I always enjoy a good dump, but it has
no special significance for me.

I think Dave has got a good point. Folks who are
ashamed about taking a shit in public are probably the same folks who never get laid! I
take a dump without any of the agonizing that many of the folks here have and I stick
my dick into a chick without giving it too much thought other then remembering to use a
condom!


CHIP BROWN:
And I bet these "afflicted" individuals prefer wet wipes over good old t.p. By having a
clean baby-wiped ass they can dispose of any remnants that may remind them of their
participation in the "evilest of deeds".

More wet wipes = more disturbed anti-poopers. This is just what Dr. Phil, Oprah and
their ilked (supported by their corporate sponsors at Johnson and Johnson and P&G
want).

It's a conspiracy people! For God's sakes open your eyes not your pocketbooks!

42 Comments on "Poop-Associated Guilt Syndrome (PAGS)"

Troy's picture
m 1+ points - Newb

Does anyone know a shameful shitter that has no problem talking about it, only doing it?

Skiddy Poo's picture
m 1+ points - Newb

My take is that the shameful shitter has problems talking about poop and pooping in public. The shameless shitter, on the other hand, has no problems with either of those activities. TrashcanMan has been working on a collaborative project with Dave: the shameless shitting doctrine. TCM should be able to define the parameters of shameful/shameless shitter for you with much more authority than I.

Dave's picture
PoopReport of the Year AwardComment Content Moderatora 10000+ points - Super Pooper

Well, me for the one. I am in full support of shameless shitting... we're working on the doctrine as we speak. But I still have trouble waltzing in to the crapper, saying hi to my boss, and dropping a duece. I'm a shameful shitter, but I run PoopReport. What a duality my life is.

Pooper's picture

I agree with Dave. I will talk and joke about poop anytime. I still hate to do it at a public restroom, and I will do almost anything to avoid using a public restroom that doesn't have doors or working locks.

Jerry's picture

There is nothing shameful about not wanting to go in public or in an open stall. I don't. I'm an excellent pooper and i do so at work quite a bit, but that's not the same as a dingy public bathroom. I would rather take a shit in an open stall than shower with about 50 other men in a gym(or as i did in basic training). When I'm sitting down atleast other guys don't stare at my Johnson.

But that gets off topic. Ever sit in a seat(non bathroom) that's still warm from it's last occupant? I find that rather gross but not intollerable(are they warm individuals, or did they pass gass into the seat cussion). A public crapper is much the same way but worse. You never know what went on in there just ten minutes before, who was getting laid or doing crack(as in the drug, not the sexual act). If everyone respected a shitter as a shitter, I'd go anywhere peacably, aside from the open stalls. Even a man who doesn't mean bad at all can glance into something like that for a second too long and creep a person out.

It's a complex issue and everyone has their reasons.

On coming out of the stall red faced, it's not always embarrasment, sometimes it's effort, or were doing something else in there...

There are places not to talk about poop, board meetings, dinner, during movies, but everyone has a different level to the rule.

The AF is a very politically correct work environment.

That means you really have to watch your mouth or you'll get slapped by social services(or whatever it's called now) with a sexual harrassment.

What have I taken away from Poop Report? Poop harrasment and sexual harrasment are two totally different things. It will be a cold day in hell when someone actually files a poop harrasment charge, thanks to all the shy poopers who don't want to discuss it.

skid mark's picture

There is nothing wrong with taking a dump away from home but why don't girls do it.Guys can shit everywhere they want with no regrets.Girls are shamefull shitters but some don't want to be (eg. me).i long for the day when i can take a dump away from home and that when i come out of the stall i don't get dirty looks.Can anyone tell when that day will come????

Larry Viggo's picture

When it comes to turds,me and my wife have a great relationship. I shit a lot more than she does,and I am always inquiring about her "brown guys". Sometimes she yells at me when I forget to buy her Metamucil,and she has to push hard to get those little buggers out. Our water pressure at home is not the greatest and occasionally she leaves me a souvenir.

cory's picture

I am a real shamefull shitter, i would never poop at school or work. I would always wait till I got home. Even in agony holding one in..I would still wait.I was that embarassed about it.

e.t.'s picture

i;m shamefl, but would get turned on if my significnt other watched me take a shit. wouldn't it be cool if 2 people went out to eat, came home, and both had to shit at the same time, and had his and her toilets where u both could dump and fart at the same time that would be the test for love.

Darren Laby's picture

After coming out of the bathroom, you should feel worthy of praise. My girlfriend is a shameful shitter, she sneaks out of there after leaving a nasty ass stench and marks in the can. Her dung is not as foul as mine though

Dumping Jack Splash's picture

e.t. - you mean you'd be turned on sexually if your partner watched while you sat and had a huge shit?

And I love your idea about two people having to shit at exactly the same time on side by side toilets....... in fact there are one or two posts about side by side toilets on this site but no his and hers stories...... come on readers - someone must have some stories on this subject.

Or - perhaps more likely how about stories about couples shitting at the same time on a single pan?? I would love to try this one but haven't found the right girl or the right opportunity - yet.......

frank's picture

I really enjoyed this

e.t.'s picture

to jack splash- yeah, i used to fantasize what it would be like sharing the same toilet while you and your mate took a shit. it would be fun to place bets whose dump is bigger, and who can fart louder. it would have to be 2 thin people for both of their asses to fit on the toilet seat. but if you can't, 2 toilets side by side would be great if you really felt close with someone. if 2 people had to dump at the same time, no one would feel embarassed. , the closeness would be unbelievable.

healthy 1's picture
j 1000+ points

Sometimes people develop a condition like this, from a traumatising experience they might have had when they were using the restroom.

They develop a false concept that if go poop, everyone will focus their attention on them, and maybee even talk about it.
_______
Jammin' lo'flo's since 1977.

"Two percent of the population think; three percent of the population think they think, and 95 percent of the population would rather die than think."

runninggrrl2's picture
Comment Quality Moderatork 500+ points

I have no problems pooping in public (my IBS makes it necessary for me to do this quite frequently), especially since I'm a quick pooper and I figure most people don't really care about whether I just took a dump or not. However, I can't talk about it openly. Weird, isn't it? It's just how I was raised, I guess. My parents always encouraged us to go whenever/wherever we had to and to them, pooping was as natural as ever. THEY have no problem talking about it. My husband's the same way...he'll poop wherever, but whenever people talk about it, he turns red and changes the topic. I don't think I've ever pooped in front of him, but he often goes in the bathroom after I'm done and he'll poop in front of me. We're pretty open about stuff like that. I think the only time he ever talked about his bowels was the time when he was walking home from Shopko and talking to me on the phone at the same time. Walking ALWAYS makes him have to go and he was talking and kind of gasping while talking to me. I asked him what was wrong and he said he had to take a dump, BAD. I consoled him and he asked me if eating half a pepperoni pizza for dinner could have been the culprit. I told him that sometimes if you throw the pH of your intestines off, they empty within about 5 minutes and you have to go...NOW. He sighed and said "Well, I'm hoping that doesn't happen until I get upstairs and in the bathroom". I had to laugh...he was silent for a while while I heard him fumble with his belt and then all of a sudden I heard a loud sploosh and a huge sigh. "Wow, that's a lot of poop...I bet the pizza's what did it" Too funny :)


_______
An apple a day keeps the ExLax away!

An apple a day keeps the ExLax away!

Rectal Badger's picture
l 100+ points

I think I suffer from a mild form of PAGS. I have no problem talking about it with you guys, but anyone else, the subject makes me feel very embarrassed and ashamed. I feel this way even when I take a dump. I notice that PAGS is more often seen in women, and I think this is because society teaches women that we must be perfect. A perfect woman doesn't poop, and what man would want her if she does do such a thing?

Rectal Badger's picture
l 100+ points

P.S. I love poop, fart and toilet humor in general very much and I'm open to discussing the bowel habits of OTHER people...but not my own. If I could have it my way, no one would guess that I ever pooped.

Dani's picture

Sometimes we're forced to talk about pooping. Such is the case with my mother. Last week while cleaning my underwear she noticed that I had skidmarks on several of them and she asked me if I was wiping correctly.
I'm in high school and the problem is the crowded toilets and only five minute passing periods. I shit almost daily--usually at mid-morning--and I can only get two or three wipes in before I need to get up off the stool and literally run to class. My mom suggests that I get a hall pass and go during class. Get real! A lot of girls spend even more time on the stools then because it's a way to break up the boredom and get out of classes. Both she and my social studies teacher, agree however, that I'm a maverick of sorts with liberal or possibly libertarian beliefs.
I have broken the analysis of my situation down to three things: what I'm wearing on a given day impacts the level of skidmarks on my panties. If I wear shorts, there's some because they are loser fitting. When I wear sweats there's almost none because they are very loose fitting. The biggest skidmarks come on days when I wear my jeans because they are tight and, when I sweat, my panties stick to my hole.
My mother compares the condition of my panties with those of my sister, who is two years older, and who goes to a parochial school which is much smaller than mine. She has much more time on the stool. However, I'll take the skidmarks because, as my dad who runs a small insurance agency says--it's just the choice I make and the cost of doing business. The alternatives, dentention time or "holding it" don't excite me.

Sis's picture

Dani--are you sure you're not my long-list twin sister? My mom asked me the same question right after I started high school in August. Urrrg! I told her the truth and it escalated into even more of a conflict between her and me. I told her our 6 minute passing periods don't give us enough time AND often when I reach for toilet paper there is none because so many of the older girls waste it by putting it down on the seat BUT THEY PEE STANDING UP SO I DON'T KNOW WHY THEY WASTE IT! Mom's worried about me catching some disease by sitting on the seats and said it's three-times more likely since I use the bathroom three times during the average school day. She also says some women she knows stand and shit, but I know I'll never be able to do that. I guess I should just start doing my own laundry, skidmarks and all because me and my friends don't see any extension of school passing periods coming this year!

Marissa's picture

I can relate to what Dani said. I, too, am afflicted or should I say infected with PAGS.

Until this year I could count on one hand the number of times I've had to poop at school. In elementary school and in middle school, it was when I had eaten something that disagreed with me and things such as squash would go right through my system. If mom would serve it at dinner or we ate out, the next morning I was unoading it at a special stop shit during the school day. It would usually be during first hour and involve an excessively soft stool--just short of diarrhea. Perhaps most menancing to me was the fact that I had to SIT DOWN to release it; otherwise I would pee two or three times a week but mom had taught me to lift the seat and squat. By the 8th grade I had gotten pretty adept at it, but sitting down to shit was something I tried to avoid. Although most of my friends thought nothing of it, putting my butt on those big black seats was a turnoff. I remember once, during my freshman year of just sitting the very back of my thighs on the seat so as to better protect myself from the "germs" my grandmother also had taught me to fear. The problem, however, was that I pooped over the front of the bowl and in curling the stool dirtied my entire pubic area. It was even grosser having to wipe the front of the bowl down and pick up about a half inch of it on the floor, which got to that point by sliding alongside my jeans. Because I was gone longer than the maximum time of 5 minutes, I got a detention from my Consumerism teacher.

This year I've learned from my friends that being comfortable shitting at school and using a public bathroom, for that matter, comes with practice. To pee, I now sit down, although I do wipe the seat off it there's some pee splashed on it (sorry--but I'm a FORMER hover pisser!) and as a senior I do relieve myself whenever I have to instead of waiting until I get home or we get to a friend's house.

Although I still have some characteristics of PAGS, I'm working on overcoming them. I plan to go to George Washington University and I will be away from home and in a much larger city.

I intend to have completely put the PAGS behind me by then.

Anonymous Coward's picture

I agree with Dani. My mom too has asked about the skidmarks on my underwear and even had the adacity to tell me I need to wipe more carefully. SORRY but there's only so much time between classes and this afternoon when I went in after school and took a good, full poop (my first in four days) there was only enough tissues on the roll to allow me a couple of wipes. I went into the adjacent stall and sat down to finish only to find that there was only one wipe's worth of paper available. Then, in the third and final stall there was nothing. I actually finished when I got off the bus and reached home. Substantial skidmarks had already been created. I also agree that shitting during class is worthless because so many kids just go in and sit for no reason in order to break up the boredom of our 90 minute class periods. If anything, custodians need to watch the restrooms more closely not just for cleaning (I hate the stalls with the water level at the top of the bowl and shit and pee floating about) but also to make sure there's enough toilet paper. For me, both are really big turnoffs that make our school restrooms suck and too many of us girls just try and hold it until we get home.

Geri's picture

I admit it: I was afflicted with PAGS. I graduated as an honor student in 1979 without ever having taken a bowel movement at my school. I would accompany my friends to the bathroom before school, right after school and sometimes during the lunch hour, but when I had to go, I would hold it. Then I had to make up excuses (I'll join up with you at the mall later but I have to stop home and get my money) or (the last half of the concert will only be an hour or so and I think I'll just hold it because those lines will be really, really long)so many times that even my closest of friends bought into it. I remember a Shaun Cassidy & Eric Carmen concert where my best friend Denise had me stand in line with her for nearly 15 minutes just to get a stall, she sat down and released one giant dump that I remember being loud by my limited standards and she said she felt great after releasing "three days worth" but I just couldn't bear to go in even though she tried to coax me. That night I took a laxative and mom excused me from my first and second hour classes until I could move my bowels at home.

I kept my record intact even though I worked in telemarketing during the day and took community college classes in the eveing. The 10 a.m. start time I selected was great because I could poop at home before going into work, or if the urge was to come later, I would hold it until I got back home and had an hour-long break before heading off to class.

Curiously, I never had a problem peeing in a public bathroom. At least once, or sometimes twice a day, at school or work I would sit down, pee and think nothing of it. On ocassion, I would wipe the seat off before sitting on it, but I wasn't a germophobe or anything like that.

When I went on to a four-year college and started living in the dorm, I met my boyfriend who had a family friend who was a counselor who specialized in what I think he called some type of "phobic studies." Anyway, it only took a few sessions for me to learn (and actually with the help of my mother) that when our family was traveling in Oklahoma when I was about six, I was quite constipated, on the stool at a highway reststop, had the head of a full shit starting to come out, but for some reason it hurt too much for me to fully push it out. Mom ended up going to a drug store, getting an enema, and giving me the enema in a public restroom with lots of women around.

Learning this at age 24 enabled me to better deal with my PAGS and since that time I have used every opportunity--and I mean EVERY opportunity--to use the bathroom immediately when I feel a shit coming. Yesterday, at 3 p.m. I was at the middle school to pick up my son. While waiting and drinking a 20-ounce coke, I felt the urge coming on. I unlocked the car door for him and walked confidently into the school to relieve myself. PAGS was then and confidence is now.

Mother of Three's picture

Geri's counseling lead to her remembering that she was traumatized by her mom giving her an enema in a public bathroom at the age of 6 when she was constipated. The embarrassment and pain of trying to poop, but not quite getting it to fully pop out and then having an enema given with others around of course is understandable. The mother seems to be insensitive, otherwise it would have been done in a motel/hotel room with more privacy and appropriateness. However, I have heard parents belittle their daughters and outright threaten them ("You better stay on that stool and pee now because there's no more breaks until we get to Chicago in four hours" or "You better make the best of the bathrooms here at McDonalds because if you wait the alternatives will be a lot more filthy" are not things young chldren should hear from their parents. In Kansas, at an Interstate rest stop I heard a mother in the stall next to me pee and then leave and open the door for her daughter to go in. Her comment: "At least you should be thankful that the last person to sit down on that seat was not a ******* ******!" Such intolerance in this day and age can be hurtful to children--especially little girls--who will frequently need to use public toilets. What are parents thinking!!!

No Excuses Mom's picture

I found Geri's posting interesting and just exactly opposite of what I do with my daughter, who if given a chance, would undoubtedly make an argument for special attention due to PAGS. The girl and her friend both had to crap at a concert, stood in line for a good amount of time and finally got to their toilet, but only the friend actually sat down and crapped. Despite coaxing, the other girl refuses to go in, sit down and take her much needed crap. Then she takes a laxative when she gets home and mom calls the school to excuse her from her lst and 2nd hour classes the next morning, or until she takes her crap at home.

Call me insenstive, but I'm not going to aid and abet PAGS by calling you out of school. My daughter, 15, has tried this three or four times this year and to no avail. I don't get paid at my plant if I don't punch in by 6 a.m. and we should be preparing our children for the real world where performance counts and hanging out is not rewarded.

Although they're not as nice as we have in our house, school bathrooms are for peeing and crapping and need to be used. Helping students avoid using them is not doing anyone a favor.

More Humane Mom's picture

I'm not so sure that I would want my 14-year-old daughter, who had taken a laxative the night before, to have her stool at school if it could involve potential cramping or diarrhea. Ideally, taking the laxative as early as possible the previous evening and possibly getting up earlier and eating or drinking something would trigger the bowel movement necessary while she still was at home. I also have a 12-year-old son who is in middle school and he has come home on two or three occasions so far this year saying he was "grossed out" by somebody that got sick at school and splattered their crap all over the seat and sometimes even onto the stall partitions. I would think that would be not only embarassing but a crushing blow to the self esteem of a boy or girl who would probably, if there were witnesses, never be able to live the incident down.

Normal craps are okey at school, although my children complain about cleanliness, crowding and lack of privacy in the bathrooms, but anything else is best done at home. One or two classes missed is the best choice, considering the alternatives.

Big Boy's picture

About once a month my girl friend won't need a ride to school because she's staying home. Her mother calls her out of school when she's been constipated and has taken a laxative until she's able to have her bowel movement. Then she comes to school late. I crap at school two or three times a week and don't really think anything of it. It's just that I sometimes have to go up a floor or two to a bathroom that has doors on the stall because I do like some privacy, although in emergencies I've used a doorless stall. Other than that, crapping at school is no big thing. I've taken laxatives a few times and crapped at school the next morning. I guess a crap is a crap no matter where you decide to drop it.

Taylor's picture

I'm a 15-year-old female, with advanced social skills, honor student status and I'm also out for a sport. I do, however, wish Big Boy and several of the others would recognize PAGS for something that it is. With me, it's an affliction that I have had since I started public school. I regularly pee at school and without problem. I squat, have become very efficient, and have almost no shame in completing that task. With PAGS, however, the issues are numerous: my butt touching the seat, the noise created, the mess left by my softer stools, the search for a stall with ample toilet paper and not knowing how much will be needed, eyes on me through the breaks in the door and partition, the smell from my really soft poops, and the knowledge that it's going to take longer and be more predictable than my much more predictable pee. Above and beyond everything else, I just don't like placing my butt on a seat that so many others have sat on and doing something that I would much prefer to do at home. If it's after about 2 p.m., I will generally hold it until I get home. However, if I have practice that day, a game or another activity, I have no choice but going through a routine that I would certainly like to avoid. Don't tell me to talk to my mother because she has it too.

poopcrayon's picture
m 1+ points - Newb

my supervisor is the worst. i know what she's doing when she goes to the downstairs bathroom.. and half the time i call her out on it. she get's soo upset and tells me to keep it down and that's not why she's going down there (sure)...she doesn't want anyone to know. then i ask her how her dump was and she tries to pull it off as if she didn't just drop a huge load... she doesn't shit...NOOOOOOOOO.


_______
all aboard the farty train to pooterville..if you can't shit at my house, we aren't friends

all aboard the farty train to pooterville

Five O'Clock Sue's picture

Taylor lists many of the reasons why I know I suffer from PAGS and have since I was in public school more than 15 years ago. Because I was singled out and got made fun of, I just got in the habit of holding it. Junior high was worse, but to my surprise, high school wasn't any better even though there was double the number of bathrooms in our large school and according to my math-whiz boyfriend, a better mathematical chance that I would be the only user in some of the restrooms. Nevertheless, I got into the habit of waiting until after school got out and then I went in and crapped before I started my long walk (15 blocks) home because I saw that as an opportunity for an accident.

Now I work in a large office building and hold my crap until just after 5 p.m. After the other 300 employees leave I go to the large bathroom on my floor and have my daily bowel movement before I head out to get my train. Both my best friend and husband know that PAGS is difficult to shake and can cause one to do some really predictable things to avoid the inevitable.

Semi-Shameful Sally's picture

Well, I'm a 24/f and I'm extremely shameful. I've actually made up stories to leave work bc I was too embarrassed to poop there, even when noone else was in the bathroom. I have no idea where it comes from, but it's been that way my whole life. No one in my family has ever made me feel embarrassed, but I just can't get past it, EXCEPT for with my s/o, which I'm assuming is pretty odd. At first I would sometimes avoid eating with him if I was staying the night bc I was so scared I'd have to poop. However, once we moved in together things changed. He eventually opened up to me and one night we were laughing about how badly our stomachs would hurt when we were together from holding it. We've been together for 4 years now, and we share EVERYTHING, including our "poops". We've both seen each other more times that I can count, and it's such a relief not to have to be worried about it. For all couples...I recommend just getting it over with. It's extremely awkward the first time, but eventually you won't care anymore. I was initially scared that he's look at me as "gross" or something, but it's never affected either of our views towards each other. If anything, it only makes us closer. Sometimes, if we're in a public place, I'll be so embarrassed that I'll make him come into the bathroom with me so that no one will know who actually did the pooping, lol. He, on the other hand, will poop anywhere. :)

Anonymous Coward's picture

I can only speak for myself on my "shamefull pooping"
goes back to childhood
my mother was rather abusive
she would go into these cleaning tirades and I as the oldest daughter would have to help clean. if i wanted to use the restroom she would "watch me" to make sure i was going and not goofing off
made it hard to go

well i guess this is better then the hundreds of dollars i would need for therepy

thanks poop report!

Anonymous Coward's picture

I like to poop. But sometimes when I poop too much it makes me tired.

sittingpretty's picture
Comment Quality Moderatori 2000+ points

I notice that sometimes a poop is accompanied with a sudden need to sleep. I wonder why that happens to me.
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...And their flesh like dung. Zeph. 1:17

...And their flesh like dung. Zeph. 1:17

CharlieSays's picture

I have half PAGS! I don't care about going at home (even if we have guests - my house, my rules) and I'm ok using a puplic bathroom as I am very unlikely to ever see anyone there again and don't care if they hear me fart! At work I can get away with it if I find a bathroom on an unoccupied floor and I'm not overly worried about talking about it with other people.

Dating is when it kicks in. Being British, I have only dated two types of guys. Those that are just as repressed and shy about toilet activities and those who have some sort of fetish about it and will ask to watch! I definitely prefer the latter. If I know a guy is actually pretty turned on by watching or hearing me then I have no shame at all and it makes my life a HELL of a lot easier and comfortable as I don't have to hold everything in while I'm staying over at their house. If I'm dating another PAG then it always makes things difficult, although eventually they will have to give in and once they have broken the ice and we've had 'the talk' I don't feel quite so bad!

I really don't know where it comes from as I have several nurses in the family, grew up with a very open and shameless brother and I am willing to talk about poop around other people. It's just specific situations that I don't like.

sittingpretty's picture
Comment Quality Moderatori 2000+ points

What is a PAGS?
_______
...And their flesh like dung. Zeph. 1:17

...And their flesh like dung. Zeph. 1:17

Bilgepump's picture
Comment Quality Moderatorh 3000+ points

Check out the story title, sweety.

_______

The proper order is kiss me, then go smell the other dog or cat's butt. I cannot stress this enough.

"One of the founding members of the Front Page Hyena Pack, and runs as its alpha male when the urge strikes him, which is often." Daphne (one perceptive chick)

sittingpretty's picture
Comment Quality Moderatori 2000+ points

My bad. One of my patients died yesterday, so I'm a little more silly than usual.
_______
...And their flesh like dung. Zeph. 1:17

...And their flesh like dung. Zeph. 1:17

Jillian's picture

I am a very complex case. After reading various pages on this site and seeing how open some people are, I suppose it wouldn't kill me to follow their example.

I'm 19 now and my whole life I've struggled with OCD, having been diagnosed at age 7. My condition is one reason why I get edgy about poop talk. But there's another that's extremely difficult to own up to: I have a bit of a fetish. No, not with feces itself. But with the actual act. I think this fetish is the reason why I had so much fecal childhood trauma; I suppose I thought that other people had this fetish and when my OCD would make me so anal retentive that eventually my body would give in, I was so ashamed when my parents and other adults, especially my grandma, would find that I'd shit myself.

In the present day, I've learned to control my bowels, and my schedule is regular enough that I usually go in the evening when I don't have to be out somewhere, but I will heavily distract myself while on the crapper; I bring my Game Boy in there and turn the volume all the way up so I don't have to hear any noises. If people are around, I'll run the water, too. Recently, I was hanging out with a male friend of mine, whom I am a bit attracted to, and I had to pee really badly, but I was holding off going to the bathroom so he wouldn't think I was pooping. My bladder got the best of me and I ended up going, but I casually specified I was peeing; I said, "If I laugh any harder, I'm going to wet my pants." This is some extreme shame on my game, and I wish I could do something about it. But thankfully, it's not because I fear that others have this fetish; I have learned that it's pretty rare and I've never actually heard of another like me.

I've been in therapy, but have never had the guts to bring this up. Any advice?

ChiefThunderbutt's picture
PoopReport of the Year AwardComment Content ModeratorComment Quality Moderatorf 5000+ points

Jillian, The best advice you can be given is to be honest with your therapist. If you withhold information you are just wasting time and money with therapy. Please believe me when I say that your therapist will not be shocked by anything you say.

Good luck.


_______
Dirty old men need love too!!

If I had two faces do you think I'd be wearing this one?

Anonymous's picture

Hi guys!
Before I start, please excuse my simple English - I am not fluent in it.

This is the first time I share my story with anyone (and I am over 40 with family and kids!). I know it might sound perverted, gross, but I need to let it go, because it might give insights to others and help me.

I was plagued with PAGS from the very early childhood. I would refuse to have a bowel movement at the daycare, at school, EVEN AT HOME! I felt embarrassed, ashamed by the act of defecation. I felt like committing a crime while defecating! As a result I would have a bowel movement once a week or less, usually after an enema administered by mother.

So I would hold it and hold it until the urge gets unbearable and soil my underwear.

Never the less my parents did not pay much attention. They thought that I am just constipated and would even bring shame on my soiled underwear and the smell, but never took steps towards a real solution.

You can imagine the embarrassment of soiling my pants at school and being an object of ridicule and abuse by my schoolmates. It was a nightmare!!! I do not even want to remember it....

After discovering masturbation, I learned to suppress my bowel movements by masturbating. I don’t know how it happened but the defecation urge and masturbation finally caught up to each other. Everything escalated as time went on and I was in this fetish for at least 20 years - having a sexual pleasure when thinking, watching or talking about stools and the act of defecation. It took me years of will and strong desire to revert and cancel this perversion, but even now I get erection unconsciously, when watching, thinking of or doing bowel movement. I do not know how to cancel that erection.

So the story goes on -- by the divine grace and mercy around 14 I was struck by a gut infection which brought me to hospital where almost dead of dehydration. I had diarrhea for a week or so and had no choice but to let it go out the natural way - bowel movements every half an hour ... Once discharged from the hospital I was surprised to find out that I felt no more guilt and shame associated with elimination. The Spell was Broken! I could freely shit again, after 14 years of torture.

However I paid a heavy toll for the years of bowel abuse and urge suppression. THE URGE FOR DEFECATION IS GONE. I feel nothing when the my rectum is full, thus I do not know when to empty it. Without this sense the automatic process of emptying the rectum, called Parasympathetic Defecation Reflex, does not work.

I do not know how to revert it and would greatly appreciate any help because defecation this way is difficult and incomplete.

As I am writing this I am thinking - when did it start? I have no memory of my first years, but PAGS must have been set in the creche during my potty training. Who knows???

Anonymous's picture

Ok, so it is taking a lot to do this, but I am going to. I am a shamefully shitter! Ooh my god.....I just said that......oooh no. I seriously feel like curling up in a ball and never letting anyone see my face. I have a terrible problem with this to the point where I will hold it in for as long as I need to so I don't do it around my boyfriend. The entire conversation of poop makes me close up inside. Ooh my it feel good to talk about this! Now I am going to delete my phone history

Anonymous's picture

Yes I am the shameful shitter that you speak of. However, it has nothing to do with some complex or being reminded of my mortality. I am not even grossed out by it (well no more than anyone else by involuntary means), but it definitely has a lot to do with self esteem and body issues. I don't mind if people talk about it or even are doing it in the stall next to me, but as soon as someone asks me about my bathroom habits I feel like curling up and disappearing. I hate the thought that anyone even knows I do it even though I know people do obviously (as a biology major I'm certainly aware that it's something everything does). I don't know where this shame came from, but I've had issues hating myself and my body as far back as I can remember. I don't think it has anything to do with traumatic potty training though, probably something much deeper that isn't exactly bathroom related. I'm trying to work on it though. I've lived with my bf for 4 years and I'm sick of feeling like I have to hide this seemingly detestable act that I can't do anything to stop. Also my bf is into butt stuff, so it's extra motivation for me to try and understand that I don't need to be forgiven for the gross things my body does and I don't need to literally hate myself for doing them. It's really weird too because I'm fine with peeing around people and I'm not modest at all, but bring up unpleasant butt stuff and you'd think I was the biggest prude. I just feel like I'm forcing people to be burdened with my humanity, and I should make myself as small and pleasant as possible to be around. Its just a very hard thing to get over. I love a good dump just like everyone else, I'm just forced to suffer in a lonely little cage of poo shame because of anxiety and self image issues.
I think it's safe to say though I do not speak for all shameful shitters. I just hope I can get over it someday. I just wanna be comfy in my own skin u know, especially in my own home.

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