Shameful Listening

j 1000+ pointsk 500+ pointsl 100+ pointsm 1+ points - Newb

So everybody knows of my Shameful Shitting. But has anybody ever been shameful about catching somebody else shitting?

My wife's boss is a cool guy. His name is Al, and before he became my wife's boss he was her equal at the company they work for. Over the years, my wife and I have partied with Al at company functions and have even hung out socially. About three years ago Al had colon cancer, and needed some surgery down there.

About a year ago, my wife and I were invited to a work party at a hotel lounge. Al was now my wife's boss, and when the party ended at about 10 PM Al wanted to keep drinking. Even though it was a work night and we were already drunk, my wife didn't want to refuse her boss -- plus, it was a perfect excuse for her to come in late the next morning, and even better, Al was buying. I am hungover every morning at work anyway, so it didn't matter much to me. So six or seven of us bellied up to the hotel bar.

After a while I had to piss. I knew Al was in the bathroom, and to avoid any one-on-one drunk conversation with him, I tried to wait it out. After another ten minutes my bladder was killing me and I couldn't take the pain, so I went to the bathroom. I entered, went to a urinal, and started to drain my lizard.

All of a sudden I heard painful moaning and heavy breathing coming from a stall. This went on for a minute or so. And then I heard "Goddammit." It was Al's voice. I don't know if his colon operation it caused him painful evacuations, or if he has always shat like that, or if he was giving birth, but I felt embarrassment. No fucking way did I want him to open that stall door and see me standing there after hearing his performance.

I tried to piss as fast as I could, but my bladder was full. I heard him fumbling with the toilet roll and panicked. I didn't even shake my dick or wash my hands -- I zipped up on the fly and got the hell out of there.

So this is a new twist on Shameful Shitting... being embarrassed by someone else blasting a nasty load.

-- Doniker

Like Doniker? He's featured in The Journal of Ass Production!

80 Comments on "Shameful Listening"

PJbrownstuff's picture
m 1+ points - Newb

I hate it when someone tries to strike up a conversation with me while he is on the toilet. I get shy.

Tydirium's picture
k 500+ points

I HATE hearing other people shit. I find it to be one of the most repulsive parts of public shitting. I guess it's because I tend to poop pretty silently.

So if I hear another shitter, I'll usually vacate the premises. But I guess that's not shame at work... it's revulsion.

Di Uhreea's picture
Comment Quality Moderatorl 100+ points

I'm working part-time for my friend's home-based company. The office is just off their kitchen where my friend and his wife are usually entertaining some other friends. The bathroom is just off the kitchen, and it has rice paper walls.

The other night I sauntered through the kitchen to the bathroom and shut the door and proceeded to take a long, loud piss. I could hear the others in the kitchen stop talking and then cough, rustle papers around, then start talking again. It was so funny. All I could think was "I wish I had a loud wet fart!!"

Lauren B.'s picture

I'm shameful in that respect -- to me, it's just embarrassing for both parties (though more embarrassing for the shitter, naturally.) So if I'm a "listener" I usually try to get the hell out of the bathroom before they emerge from their stall. I sort of giggle to myself on the way out, though, happy I'm not in their shoes (girls don't usually take a public shit unless it's some bad diarrhea.)

ThreePly's picture

I think its funny just so long as you're done pissing or done with whatever you're doing while the other person is shitting. Once the that person steps out of that stall, they claim instantaneous shamelessness, and some just can't cope with that.

nature pooper's picture

For me there is no more cosmic experience than pooping outside - especially under a big tree, near a big rock and overlooking a river. For some reason, a poop perch with a view just can't be beat. Recently, however, while performing this very personal p-act, I discovered I was not as alone in my nautural splendor as I thought. I was so careful about picking my place to poop - again, mostly concerned about the view - when out of nowhere a gaggle of girl scouts happened upon my pooping place. Well, with my pant far away from the pooping area, they not only listened but watched as well as I frantically tried to pre-empt my pooping process. I guess I can be thankful I caused as little commotion as I did - I would hate to think how irreversablly shameful it all would have been if those little girls had been from a Catholic summer camp. No one needs that kind of shame in there life.

Slim Jim Junkie's picture

I hate hearing guys shit!

Shawn St James's picture

I DEFINATELY avoid the simultaneous hand washing experience as much as possible.

HOW BOUT THEM BEARS",,,is more than i can take. I guess it's better than "Than last squirt sounded like bad news""

Big Dumper's picture

This is an interesting topic. My take on it is as follows: If you're a shameless shitter and someone you know who is dumping (like in the situation Doniker describes) is also shameless, there should be no problem at all in hearing the latter take an average to noisy dump. On the other hand, if either of the two parties is shameful about shitting, then one or both will be embarrassed. I always feel amused if I'm taking a leak or washing my hands in a public restroom and a dude comes out of a stall after a noisy dump looking as if he has committed a capital crime. On the other hand, I admire those guys who emerge from the stall with a satisfied grin and give you a hearty "Howdy!" Good commentary Doniker!

honey_monster's picture

But would Doniker have still been embarrassed if he did not know about Al's colon operation? Is the reason for embarresment the fact that the dump sounded so painful that Doniker associated this with Al's cancer op. So rather than acknowledge this, Doniker wanted to save the man his dignity by high tailing it out of there so Al believed he'd unloaded in private?

Or does Doniker just not like hearing people answering that call of nature? Interesting questions indeed.

doniker's picture
j 1000+ pointsk 500+ pointsl 100+ pointsm 1+ points - Newb

Bottom line...they should outlaw restrooms that have the capability to allow more than one person at a time to shit and/or piss.

Every public restroom should have one toilet and one sink, behind a locking door. This way, if you emerge from the restroom and someone is waiting, nobody knows what you did in there....unless of course it stinks like hell.

Rick's picture
m 1+ points - Newb

I think this site is cool. I never realized that people had so many hangups about shit.I'm usually pretty shameless unless it is really raunchy in a public place. But anyone who says "I hate to hear guys shit" really needs to get a grip. I've always had more respect for a guy who lets one rip than one who has to flush 5 times.

brian chambers's picture

I'm a guy who likes to be heard on the toilet having a good loud shit, therefore I like to hear other guys equally uninhibited as they sit there dropping their turds. I'm proud to sit there dominating the toilet dropping my plops into it; it means I'm using it, my body's working properly, I'm not wimpish about it, and the other guys can feel cool about the sounds they make too. Public shitting? Be proud of yourselves, JUST DO IT! PLOP!

Mrs Shameless Shitter's picture

I have to admit it: it absolutely makes my day when I go into the bathroom at work and someone else is in there grinding and grunting away. I love it! Women try so hard to be discreet, subdued, even silent. It's hilarious when they are forced to show their true colors.

At my office, there are only 2 stalls in the ladies room, and it's perfectly clear who's in the stall from their shoes or even from the color of their feet. It's also perfectly clear whose shit stinks, who plugs the bowl with turds, tampons and too much tissue. I find myself much more repulsed watching women staring into the mirror plucking their eyebrows, reapplying their lipstick or flossing their teeth than taking a noisy crap at work.

e.t.'s picture

i am a shameless shitter, hoping i;ll change some day

e.t.'s picture

does anyone have good advice to be less shy while having to shit. i'm more embarassed that i might let out a fart sound, than the smell. i am not ofended by others though. am i love coming home, relaxed to take a nice shit, reading a magazine in privacy, secretly hoping someome might spy on me without me knowing it. of course, it neverhappens. i know taking a shit is natural, but the embarassed part exists. help me someone outthere. when you take a shit, you know you never know when a far might slip out.

poo poo pal's picture

e.t. phone home!

e.t.'s picture

to poopoo pal. i;ll glady call you when this girl has to sit down and take a massive dump. maybe you'll want to listen to the cracking and farting sounds too?

dickweed's picture

I understand doniker, you and I are similar beasts.
I watched a dog slurp up a pile of turds like spagetti today, dry heaving ensued.

AssAssassin's picture

I am a shameful shitter but I'm currently working on overcoming my shyness. The sound of another guy shitting his brains out is the sound of freedom. It lets you know that guy has the guts (and bowels) to express what he had for dinner last night.

Question...'s picture

I we are to be free from our shitting constraints, doesnt that mean that even if you have to listen to another person take a shit, you still salute them for heaving one in Public?

The Shit Volcano's picture
Comment Quality Moderatorh 3000+ points

I have no problem hearing someone else piss and/or shit. The only thing that bothers me is the smell afterward.

I found Jesus! He was behind the sofa the whole time!

A very REGULAR guy's picture

Growing up, My buddies and I shared a house with a "Jack and Jill" bathroom. We would make the announcement/question by saying, "S.S.W.T.S. anyone?" This stood for "Shooting the Shit While Taking a Shit". We would go in to the adjoined bathrooms together and, well, shoot the shit....while taking a shit. It's alot less lonely and ever since, I've never had a problem with mine or anyone elses shit. I'm a father now, and I try to encourage shamelessness about pooping with my boys. It just makes life easier.

Sitting Wiper's picture

A very REGULAR guy. Like you I am bringing up my boys to be shameless about pooping.

But with two provisos:

1) I personally want them to look upon this as an activity with other males. (They have seen their mother and their sister using the toilet, and our little girl has seen me, and them - all as part of their overall education.) All three of us males use one bathroom, and my wife and daughter use another.

2 I want them to be a bit reticent with other people, without being shameful and embarrassed. Part of the training has been (a) to sit on the toilet in somebody else's house, eg grandparents and other relatives and friends. Usually that has been when the two of them have been staying their together and the younger one has more confidence when the older one is with him.

2 They have also learned to do it without anybody else being in the bathroom. My younger boy did this on his own recently at his grandparents, and was very proud of himself.

3. They also have to learn to use public toilets. My older boy and his pal recently graduated into sitting on the toilet at school. Shortly they are going away on a field trip, and will have to do things like that while there.

Sitting Wiper's picture

The 2. and 3. shouldn't be there in my last two paragraphs

Craptain Pooping's picture

Mr. Sitting Wiper,
I commend you for taking "potty training" to the next level. That's just goooood parenting.

Sitting Wiper's picture

Thankyou, Craptain Pooping for your compliment. My training has recently shown results. Part of it has been to train my older boy to train the younger boy. If I've gone to work early, before they are up, he takes him into the shower with him, and before school supervises his teeth-cleaning and tucks his shirt in for him and helps him to look respectable after he's finished sitting with his trousers down. I'm dead proud of both of them.

shit4thestars's picture

i love it when i hear and smell the wet bodily gases releasing from another being. It expresses their individual style. For some the wet ones show that they are lactose intolerant. While the loud dry ones show to be a regular kinda shitter. 4 me im both on certain days. On Baked Beans n ham Tuesday i express my wet side. While Sausage Sunday i show my dry side. Be not ashamed my friends, 4 we all do it and it is Natural.People need to learn how to shit with pride and pleasure. So next time your in the public listening to the guy next door, just say "What a relief. ehh..?" and chances are the guy will say "hell yeah dude" and then u will talk to him when u r done and become friends and go out for a drink. Long live the shameless!!

CultureGeek's picture

To be honest, I really think that shitting shouldn't be "shameful" or associated with that word at all. It's natural(like many have mentioned), organic, and healthy. I do agree with Mrs Shameless Shitter about girls and their makeup and whatnot. It makes me wonder why some people prefer to believe in boob jobs, skin stretching and other cosmetic surgery than poo. Come on, JUST POO AND GET OVER IT.

Coprologist's picture

The great thing about shitting in a public toilet is listening to the noises made by the guys in the adjacent stalls and replying with your own collection of farts and grunts and plops. That's why shopping malls where they play canned music in the toilets really get me enraged.

Cari's picture

I am a shameless shitter, and will admit that I love to hear others shit with pride and gusto! Power to the Poopers!! Yeah, I am new to the site, but you're not going to hold that against me, are you? I love this site!! I have to get up really early, but I stumbled onto this and can't break off...

cocosolo's picture

I know now that I am a shameful shitter but I dont want to be, I want to be able to shit with pride like any shameless shitter, maybe some day

Danny's picture
m 1+ points - Newb

i am a shamles shitter. at my work there is a unisex toilet blok wich has no stalls just 7 small chemical tolets lined up in this one shed with no walls or nothing in between them. u can just see the other person taking a dump. not many people like to use the toilets because of this.

shitofshits's picture
m 1+ points - Newb

Have some they say shitting is a zen moment, so pissing, or shitting with someone in the next stall making tons of noise is not a conducive environment for leaving a load of shit.

I hate taking a piss in a long horse like water bin, because everyone knows who is male that all of the others males in the same area taking the piss too are trying check out the lizard that everyone else has. But no man will admit it. Its like men don't know not to look. Where's the freakin privacy at the urinal. Those dam small walls of separation don't cut....

There should be specialist out there for designing better restrooms.

Not here!

Nine Inch Log's picture
k 500+ points

Time was I used to be a shameless listener. Things have changed in large part to my girlfriend. She laughed so hard one day after hearing me take a loud, hurricane style shit. Since then things have been less ackward and sometimes we have compititions to try and make the loudest shits.

Number One . . . I order you to take a number two.

Number One . . . I order you to take a number two.

healthy 1's picture
j 1000+ points

I don't mind hearing someone next door to me doing their business, just as long as the ass gas isn't too intense.
It's not nice to fool mother nature.

"Two percent of the population think; three percent of the population think they think, and 95 percent of the population would rather die than think."

LeandraCullen's picture
Comment Quality Moderatork 500+ points

I agree with healthy 1, as long as I'm not going to be incapacitated by your smell, I could care less that you're doing that next to me.
I will never shit somewhere that only has that horrible, scratchy brand of toilet paper. That stuff sucks!

The Original Grasshopper

Small and Solid's picture
m 1+ points - Newb

I used to line the toilet with paper to stop the tell-tale splash, even if it was in the desert! I don't like people hearing me shit, let alone fart. When I was married, my husband, when he knew I was in the bog would yell "waddya do for an encore?".

I would rather be caught farting than shitting. So many people don't have the courage to fart. Take my stepfather: he gets out of bed half an hour before everyone else and drops fifteen minutes worth of dungers in the echoing toilet next to my room. He doesn't fart for the rest of the day. My mother: holds them all day, then locks herself in the walk-in pantry, lights a cig, pours a wine and lifts her buttcheek. This facilitates a noiseless (hopefully) fart. The pantry is full of it and it is all when the stepfather is snoring in his chair. Poor Mum!

daphne's picture
PoopReport of the Year AwardSite AdminComment Content ModeratorComment Quality Moderatore 6000+ points

Mum is a closet wino?

I, too, would drink wine in a closet and fart.

I like her already.

Welcome to Pooreport!

.....hugging bunnies since 1969

.....hugging bunnies since 1969

MSG's picture
Comment Quality Moderatori 2000+ points

I actually enjoy hearing other people poop. Yesterday I actually had to leave class for what proved to be a mild diarrhea attack; while I was still there, a student came into the neighboring stall (there are only two). He dropped three pieces that hit with sonorous thudsplashes, so I think he was pooping from a near-standing position so as not to sit on the seat. While I was not happy to be there, it was intriguing to hear my neighbor's labors.

The Thunderous Crapper 63's picture
k 500+ points

I like putting on a show myself so when others do the same its okay. I like to sit down and lean into it creating an extremely loud nuclear crap bomb especially if the food has made me gassy. If it stops conversation I simply go Ahhhhhhemmmmmmmm JUST CLEARING MY THROAT!
The Thunderous Crapper 63 Enjoying home toilet advantage since 2004!


DR T's picture
m 1+ points - Newb

It does not bother me what the person in the next stall does. What does bother me is no doors on the stall! I like to be alone with my thoughts.

No paper in the stalls bother me also!

sittingpretty's picture
Comment Quality Moderatori 2000+ points

I prefer not hearing and not being heard...unless I want to be heard on pupose.
...And their flesh like dung. Zeph. 1:17

...And their flesh like dung. Zeph. 1:17

hayley's picture
m 1+ points - Newb

It doesn't bother me what the person in the next stall is doing. Everyone poops.

prarie doggin's picture
PoopReport of the Year AwardComment Quality Moderatorg 4000+ points

Anything that goes on in an ajacent stall is of no bother to me. However, if a tampon applicator falls to the floor and rolls into my stall, I might be a bit alarmed.

Hershey Squirt's picture

Has anyone ever heard classical shameless shitting? I swear, the lady in the stall next to me was shitting to Beethoven.Probably left some lovely flecks of excrement all around the inside of the bowl while she was at it. I didn't stick around for an encore because I was laughing so hard.

ChiefThunderbutt's picture
PoopReport of the Year AwardComment Content ModeratorComment Quality Moderatorf 5000+ points

HS......Which one of Beethoven's works was this person shittng to?
I once farted the first movement of the 5th symphony, unfortunately I shit the opening note of the second movement and had to quit.

Eat chilies and feel the burn!!

If I had two faces do you think I'd be wearing this one?

Poopycheeks's picture
m 1+ points - Newb

If someone else is having a poop, usually I'll join them in the next stall over. If there isn't another stall or I only had to pee, I'll give them a silent cheer!

Don't worry, I do it, too!

Don't worry, I do it, too!

Mrs. Mad Crapper's picture
Comment Quality Moderatorj 1000+ points

Some of these comments remind me of when Peter from Family Guy tried to outfart Michael Moore

Earth, insane asylum for the universe.

Hershey Squirt's picture

I believe it was the 5th symphony, Chief. I would've loved to hear you try to outdoo her. Kind of like dueling banjos. I believe that is what Family Guy's Peter was battling to in that episode Mrs. Mad Crapper was referring to.

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