Becoming a Shameless Shitter

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j 1000+ pointsk 500+ pointsl 100+ pointsm 1+ points - Newb
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Editor's note: Doniker's fear of public pooping has been well documented.

Thanks to advice given on PoopReport, I have passed the first step in
getting over my fear of pooping in the public restroom at work.

Two days ago while at work, around 3:00 PM, I was sitting at my desk, holding in a
bomb like usual, waiting for the end of the day so I could go home and release
it. Well, I had a meeting to attend with my bosses at 4:00, and there was no way I
was going to make it.

I think the fear of shitting my pants in the meeting was
greater than any eye contact in the bathroom. So I decided I would get rid of the
load before the meeting started.

I walked into the restroom and by the grace of God it was empty! I headed for the
good ol' handicapped stall and it was clean -- a rare occurance this late in the
day. God was on my side.

Just then, one second before I was locked inside my
cubicle of relief, in walks a co-worker. In the course of a moment two thoughts ran
through my mind: turn and leave the restroom, or walk in the stall.

Well, I said to him, "Hey man. what's up?" and entered the stall!

Once inside I felt so proud! I will admit I sat in silence, holding in my gas
and dung until he finished taking his piss, washing his hands and then finally
exited (which seemed like a lifetime) but I still took care of business.

I have seen this co-worker several times since that day and everything is
fine. He doesn't care that I shit.

I think I may be on the road to recovery. Who knows, a year from now I might be blowing farts in an office meeting!! Thank you, PoopReport!!!


-- Doniker

Like Doniker? He's featured in The Journal of Ass Production!

23 Comments on "Becoming a Shameless Shitter"

Dave's picture
PoopReport of the Year AwardComment Content Moderatora 10000+ points - Super Pooper

and mom my said I wasn't doing anything with my life... clearly, PoopReport is helping people live better lives! I'm proud of you, Doniker... you've come so far... *sniff*

Hillbilly's picture
m 1+ points - Newb

Doniker...you kick ass!!! I so proud.

Jeff B's picture
l 100+ points

The first step in recovery is admitting you have a problem.

Trashcanman's picture
l 100+ points

I had this problem when I was young, and one day, I realised, hey, it IS a shitter after all, why not use it? I was a happy shitter, and pisser too, but... One day, it went too far... I was taking a leak at work, and a co-worker was in the stall. We got talking about how he was from alabama, and there is a good reasturaunt on the I-10 causeway in Mobile, and by the time i got done, terror! I looked down to see I had lost track, and lost my aim! I had warm piss all down my leg! I tried and tried to dry it, but my friend was almost done! I had to walk across the office hoping to god no one looked, and I had my overshirt way down low, but it never did seem quite long enough!

Johnny Hotfarts's picture

Once I was leaving for the restroom at the same time as the smarmy CFO of our company. I figured he was just going down the elevator, but he entered the bathroom right behind me and settled into the stall next to mine. He started to ask me how my family was! This was followed by several grunts, farts and calls to a higher power. Needless to say, I waited until he was finished and left the room before I emerged from my stall.

Patsy Wagner's picture

I also love to take large craps, and because of your story I have become so confident in myself that I take regular craps on occasion during my class periods! Thanks to you I can fart freely now. Please feel free to email me for tips!

PATSY THE POOP <-- EMAIL ME's picture

IT'S ME AGAIN! I HAVE GREAT NEWS! I just took my first major crap-in-the-pants on the airplane! I had never done it before and I was always curious, so I just pushed and let it flow! PLEASE E-MAIL ME!

Turd Ferguson's picture

*clinched fist, raised in the air*

Poop on, Doniker. Poop on.

poopy patty women's picture

YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I can poop and be proud!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!Thank u soooooooooooo much!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The_shitman's picture

I too have been inspired by poop report. I have gone from messing up bathrooms with my feces to actualy creating art in bathrooms with my fecal waste.

Thanks to poop report I have even been submitting my art to many resturants and local malls and even my college. Thanks a ton dave and the others. From now on I will strive more to be a shameless shitter

pooofortoiletfoo's picture

Check this cartoon out. www.rsubox.com Find the central toilet section and watch the episodes. Really shameless shitting at it's best!!!
Sean

Loving My Bowels's picture

I used to be afraid to take a #2 in a public bathroom. I read this site through twice and then started to Shamlessly shit my brains out. I persoannly walk into a bathroom and pull off a number two, not trying to disgust anyone, just looking for that "Zen" moment. When i walk out of the bathroom and there is a little prick looking at me like im some freak for excreating waste in a place that is meant for such a thing,I talk to them. I ask them how they are and if they need any help finding a good stall. This helps me be less embaressed if I am at all.For me, if sombody else is embarresed then I feel less shamful about my B.M. I would advise all shamful shitters to try this.

The Shit Volcano's picture
Comment Quality Moderatorh 3000+ points

Or better yet, ask them if they need help using the bathroom. Obviously people who think you're a freak for using a toilet must not know why toilets were invented in the first place. Perhaps they need some instruction. To demonstrate the flushing mechanism: insert poopee's head in bowl and let er swirl!

I found Jesus! He was behind the sofa the whole time!

trigunner's picture

Here is a way to become a shameless shitter. Become diagnosed with irritable bowel sydrome. I worked for me. Hell, when your colon is constantly pissed at you, you have to take your chances in public bathrooms. I've learned to thrive on it, especially since I have to do it so often. Sometimes I make it into a game. I'll walk in, thinking to myself, "I'm going to make this the loudest, stinkiest crap known to man." And sure enough, I manage to clear out a whole restroom pretty easily.

Raw-Hide's picture

Doniker, you are beacon of hope and admiration to the shameless. May you poop with pride!

the phantom mess's picture

my bum hurts :(

Anonymous's picture

I once shat myself at a cabin in winter, so I just walked upstairs and tried hard not to laugh, then filled up the toilet with sweet, sweet nectar. I dont think anyone used that broom for the next 3 weeks!

healthy 1's picture
j 1000+ points

Great work Doniker. I know what goes through a shamefull's mind. I was a shamefull too.

Poop on!
_______
It's not nice to fool mother nature.

"Two percent of the population think; three percent of the population think they think, and 95 percent of the population would rather die than think."

Anonymous Coward's picture

The best cure is having IBS, the fact that you can have to go anytime anywhere and it doesn't matter if there is a bathroom or not. Once I went on a small hike with a new girl friend, about 10mins into this venture i had to go, and had to go NOW! So i told her to hold on sec, and exited the path, i found a good spot and squatted, while in mid poo, my then worried gf asks from the path if i'm ok, i said yeah i'll be out in a second...that second ended about 20 mins later...we got another 10 mins down the trail it happens again...only this time i only make it about 4 feet off the main path, and she witnessed it all. This proceeded the rest of day, that day i decided if i can shit infront of my gf, i can shit infront of anyone..theory was later proved true....but we won't go there just yet....

Anonymous Basturd's picture

Any tips on pooping at school?

Shameless Male's picture

My girlfriend, also a junior at my high school, helped me become a shameless shitter. I got really turned off to shitting at school when I started middle school and our almost brand new "state-of-the-art" school was lacking something as fundamental as stall doors for the guys. At first, I would go in, select a stall, sit down but before I could start shitting, others would come in. I guess I allowed myself to be spooked and I would quickly get up, pull up my pants, flush to make it seem real, and then take off. Later that day, I would go through the same ritual. As the year went by, I would often come up on four stalls, all of which had urine on the seat and some level of shit in the bowl. (I thought the student council should have had a lift and flush campaign, but I was a nobody!) On average, I would probably sit down five times for every time I was able to produce without interruption. Once when my mom found out I was constipated (I would sometimes hold my dump for the entire school day and then hurry home to unload), she suggested I might feel more comfortable putting some toilet paper over the seat so I wasn't sitting in as many germs. It hurt when my sister, who overheard the conversation, thought it was hilarious. And a couple of times when I lined the seat, older boys coming in called me a ######!

It didn't get any better in high school because most of the heavily used bathrooms on the main floor were open stall. And rather than waiting in line for the urinals, guys would pee right over the seat. However, my girlfriend last year said she sits down two or three times a day and just makes the best of it. Of course, the girls rooms have stall doors and she wipes the seat off first, but she said it just takes practice. Because she's in activities before and after school, she is even more shameless than I am. One day she said she used the facilities FIVE times. Once I adopted the attitude she has, sitting down for a daily shit is rather easy. I select the cleanest stall, sit down,shit, wipe, then flush and wash my hands. I do, however, ocassionally think about coming in before school, equally peeing over each the seats and getting my "due" in watching how some of the younger users cope with it. But I'm a survivor and shameless shitter at Central High!

Shameless Deanna's picture

Shameless Male, I sympathize with you. While I hover over the toilet to pee (a choice I made due to the need to save time during my freshman year last year), I didn't look forward to taking a crap at school. I'm self-conscious, somewhat shy, I've been known to fart loudly before I evacuate and even produce a heavy enough drop that I need to quickly stand up from the seat in order to prevent from getting wet. Once this past spring, my drop splashed water onto the back part of the seat, and the girl using the stall after me, started to turn around when she saw it. When I explained to her what it was, she decided to use the toilet and not get back into the line waiting. There's something to crapping in a very public place that I don't like. A couple of years ago at an auditorium rock concert (the first my mom let me go to without her going with me)I tried to hold my pee, but eventually I went down and emptied my bladder. An hour later, I had to crap and I tried to hold it but I finally survived the line, sat down and within two minutes I was wiping from a full bowl's worth of production! The bigger the bathroom, the bigger the hassle. But by working through it and no longer making excuses, I've gained confidence. Crapping, however, without a stall door would freak me out!

ChiliKahKah's picture
j 1000+ points

I can hear it now...I will go into a Shameless Shitter Meeting and introduce myself....My name is Chili and I am a shameless shitter.

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