A Pair Of Pooems

// // 12 Comments
m 1+ points - Newb
0
0

Wash It Off

You get the urge

To drop a load.

It's time to walk the hall.

You haven't pooped

In two damn days;

There is no way it's small.

You drop your pants

You sit on down

And try to push it out.

It peeks its head

Then runs back scared;

You know it's stuck - no doubt.

Think to yourself.

What do I do?

Reach down, give it a poke?

Push to the side

Then it will slide.

Is this a shitty joke?

All of a sudden

And without warning,

The brown thing has broken free!

Except it lands

In your right hand...

You wash it off with pee.









I Really Gotta' Poop

Driving home this afternoon,

The pedal to the floor.

I couldn't hold it any longer,

I stopped off at the store.

The cashier jumped in front of me

And tried to block my way.

I pushed his ass off to the side

And then I heard him say,

"You can't go running through this store

'If you fall down, it's a law suite."

I yelled back, "Hey, I'm sorry, pal,

'But i really gotta poop!"

12 Comments on "A Pair Of Pooems"

sittingpretty's picture
Comment Quality Moderatori 2000+ points

Refreshing pooems for a fine Monday morn. I like the first one best.
_______
...And their flesh like dung. Zeph. 1:17

...And their flesh like dung. Zeph. 1:17

RoboCrap13's picture
l 100+ points

Those could be set to music! Nice!

_______
You have the right to remain Silent but Deadly....

You have the right to remain Silent but Deadly....

mikeeemorgan's picture
m 1+ points - Newb

i have an idea. tonight's karaoke night...

please visit my writings at http://allpoetry.com/mikeeemorgan

Deja Poo's picture
Comment Quality Moderatorj 1000+ points

You are prodigious, Morg. Great pooetry. I really like your style. Keep up the good work.
_______
Yo quiero Taco Bell.

Yo quiero Taco Bell.

mikeeemorgan's picture
m 1+ points - Newb

i'm heading down
to the corner bar
for a night of karaoke.

i've put together
a mix of songs
all taken from recent pooetry.

now, if i get boo'd
off of the stage
it'll be for my own good.

but on my way out
i'll find a restroom
and leave a gift of poop.

thanks to all for reading my crap.
-michael j. morgan

please visit my writings at http://allpoetry.com/mikeeemorgan

Squat-n-leaveit's picture
Comment Quality Moderatork 500+ points

Got up this morning
stretching and yawning
the weather was dark and gray

Before pee'n or poop'n
or get the day move'n
Check out poopreport right away

What are CEP's ramblings
PD's word scrambling
My lust for sweet Daphne

Bilge wiping with critters
Those poor shameful shitters
The latest from Bran and SP

The Chief my wise brother
From a different mother
I wish so much to read

Check out all recent post
What I enjoy most
My heart was filled with glee

At the top of the list
Impossible to be missed
My favorite, Poo-itry

Thunderbox's picture
PoopReport of the Year AwardComment Quality Moderatorj 1000+ points

Keep them coming, Mike.

As sp said, a bit of refreshing pooetry is just fine on a Monday morning. Though in my case it lifted my spirits when I read them after a hellish day at work.

Squat - you need to submit some pooetry for the front page!

The voice of sanity

prarie doggin's picture
PoopReport of the Year AwardComment Quality Moderatorg 4000+ points

The pooetry is inspiring
Not the least bit tiring
It makes my heart want to dance.

But thanks to squat
That kilt wearing twat
I promptly pissed my pants.

(sorry Squat, the only other word I could think of that rhymed was snot, and you know me, I don't like to get disgusting)

mikeeemorgan's picture
m 1+ points - Newb

this is fun! sorry about your hellish day at work, tb. hope all is well tomorrow. anyway, i have alot more waiting to be posted. thanks alot for reading and commenting. hope you enjoy my crap.

-michael.

please visit my writings at http://allpoetry.com/mikeeemorgan

mikeeemorgan's picture
m 1+ points - Newb

hey, squat!!! nice rhymes!!! thank's for reading my shitty writings. hope you read "ceramic shores" and "waiting in line." please, write some more!!!

-michael

please visit my writings at http://allpoetry.com/mikeeemorgan

Anonymous Coward's picture

How about a haiku? I would do it but I can't remember the syllable rules.

Squat-n-leaveit's picture
Comment Quality Moderatork 500+ points

Nonamos coward
Needs a rule book for haiku
Better check Google

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