Ode To The Creeper Shit

m 1+ points - Newb

To preface: I work in a very small and closely knit office. The bathroom is practically in the center of the room, so smells and noises are very noticeable. As we are all women in the office, the bathroom mostly goes unused (a shameful practice, but understandable and sometimes, appreciated).

But today I had the worst of them all: the creeper. You know, the one that just will not come out short of 35 minutes and a magazine? The kind of poop where you start reading the labels on the backs of bottles and toothpaste? Anything just to pass the time? Yes. That one.

"Ode to the Creeper Shit"

Ode to the creeper shit

In our quiet office building,

How you sit and make me sweat

Like a church-going Sunday morning.

I know you know they hear me

Quietly strain and struggle,

And yet you stay there, waiting,

In the caverns of my butt hole.

Just you wait, you little creeper shit;

I will get into the zone.

Once the clock hits five p.m.,

I will destroy you from my throne.

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5 Comments on "Ode To The Creeper Shit"

the thin brown line's picture
j 1000+ points

Creeper shit
Come out, come out
make that exit
make that exit
make that exit
make that exit
make that exit
make that exit
bravo Erica M...short and to the point.

Somethin' mysterious made an exit from the gift shop.

MSG's picture
Comment Quality Moderatori 2000+ points

Time is limited.
Yet I feel the pressure build--
Yes, I have to poop.

Sitting down, I fart,
Feel the big piece at the end
Of my rectum, but

Will it come out? No,
So I push with might and main,
Grunting the whole time.

Finally, slowly,
Progress--I can feel it come,
Past my anus--sploosh!

the thin brown line's picture
j 1000+ points

That wasn't a shit that passed past your anus, it was a liver!

Somethin' mysterious made an exit from the gift shop.

ChrisM's picture
l 100+ points

Also known as The Crippler: By the time you're done, you try to get up and fall flat on your face because your legs have fallen asleep.

The ChrisM virus is incompatible with your current operating system. Your system will now be rebooted into DOS and return to the virus.

daphne's picture
PoopReport of the Year AwardSite AdminComment Content ModeratorComment Quality Moderatore 6000+ points

MSG, I adore haikus! (Haipoos)

Hot sauce on my shirt,
I pause to lick the wrapper;
Ode to Taco Bell!

Adoration wanes
As I hover o'er the pot...
My ring piece cries foul.


.....hugging bunnies since 1969

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