More Pooetry

// // 12 Comments
m 1+ points - Newb
0
0

Bad Timing

Ran down the hall

And into the bathroom.

And sat down on the throne.

So much for my interview.

Bad timing;

My plans are blown.

Sitting here and

Pushing hard.

The damn thing just won’t budge.

I'm wasting time,

With no progress

To lose my chocolate fudge.

I grab some paper ,

Prepare to wipe,

And suddenly I sneeze.

The snake runs free

And splashes down

Into Ceramic Seas.



Remember To Wipe

Trying to write some poetry

While trying to take a crap.

Balancing a computer

That's sitting on my lap.

Daphne has no idea

What I am doing now.

If she knew my pants were down,

She'd probably have a cow.

I think that I am done,

And have been for some time.

I set the computer on the floor,

And wipe this ass of mine.

There seems to be a problem;

I'm out of toilet paper.

Guess that I'll just skip this step

And remember to wipe later.

12 Comments on "More Pooetry"

daphne's picture
PoopReport of the Year AwardSite AdminComment Content ModeratorComment Quality Moderatore 6000+ points

No, not hardly. I have been a member of this site for so long that the thought of someone pooping while typing -- or trying to form prose -- has no effect of me whatsoever. In fact, it’s a mainstay of many poopers here, like our boy phats. Yay, I feel no ill effects from reading such literary ilk. It would take a person standing on my doorstop with an actual toilet tied to his ass, laughing, while he twirled the heads of twenty or so Barbie dolls, to surprise me at this point.

Sadly.


_______
.....hugging bunnies since 1969
www.daphneszoo.com

.....hugging bunnies since 1969
www.daphneszoo.com

mikeeemorgan's picture
m 1+ points - Newb

wow. that barbie doll thing is kinda... voo-doo-ish. is that a word? it is now! thanks for the post.

please visit my writings at http://allpoetry.com/mikeeemorgan

Deja Poo's picture
Comment Quality Moderatorj 1000+ points

Are you casting down the glove, Daphne? Now that you've put it in print, someday you're going to answer the door only to find an American Standard encumbered gentleman juggling Barbie doll heads. And you will have only yourself to blame for it.
_______
Yo quiero Taco Bell.

Yo quiero Taco Bell.

Mr Schitz's picture
m 1+ points - Newb

Damn Mikee....thats good shit. Keep the pooetry coming.

How about if Saddam Hussein's supposed solid gold toilet was to show up at Daphne's door strapped to the ass of the juggler? Would that add an element of suprise???

prarie doggin's picture
PoopReport of the Year AwardComment Quality Moderatorg 4000+ points

I'd be quite impressed as a solid gold toilet weighs in at about 900 pounds. He'd have one saggy ass after that was removed.

I once saw a juggler that juggled a baseball, bowling ball and a potato chip. I was impressed by that for some reason.

Deja Poo's picture
Comment Quality Moderatorj 1000+ points

Was it a bacon-wrapped potato chip, PD?
_______
Yo quiero Taco Bell.

Yo quiero Taco Bell.

Butt of the Joke's picture
l 100+ points

There was every right to be impressed by it,PD.The chip would kill the rythym of juggling.Not to mention it could very easily get crushed or simply blown away.
_______
More people flush than they do wash their hands.

More people flush than they do wash their hands.

Bumflaps's picture
m 1+ points - Newb

There once was a Juggler called harvey,
Who juggled with heads off of barbie.
while stuck to his bum,
Was a commode made of gum.
he shouted I've got to See Daphne.


_______
AAh Crap

AAh Crap

Deja Poo's picture
Comment Quality Moderatorj 1000+ points

BWAHAHA. Someone should GREAT Bumflap's limerick! S/He deserves a point or more for that one.
_______
Yo quiero Taco Bell.

Yo quiero Taco Bell.

MSG's picture
Comment Quality Moderatori 2000+ points

I would GREAT it, but it doesn't rhyme. Writing limericks is not as easy as it looks or sounds, and finding the right rhyme is often a challenge. The rhythm has to work, too (which Bumflaps's poem does). I could give it a "Pretty Good," just not quite Great.

Harvey stands at the door, toilet tied
To his ass, as he pushes with pride,
Juggling Barbie dolls while
Releasing his pile;
Daphne sniffs, "Dude, it smells like you died."

Butt of the Joke's picture
l 100+ points

Now THAT is a limerick!Pretty good Bumflaps,but MSG's is great!
_______
More people flush than they do wash their hands.

More people flush than they do wash their hands.

Bumflaps's picture
m 1+ points - Newb

Great work msg, that really rrrrolls off the tongue.

_______
AAh Crap

AAh Crap

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