Intellectual Crap
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Dear John: PoopReport Interviews The Toi
Submitted by Trashcanman
November 22, 2002, 10 Comments

Burt Stark is a toilet guru. Curator of the Toilet Museum, an online collection of toilet art and pop culture, Burt was gracious enough to participate in this interview with our PoopReporter, Trashcanman. PoopReport: So first, tell me how you got started. My guess is that the idea came to you...

ShitBegone: An Interview With Jed Ela
Submitted by Dave
August 13, 2002, 21 Comments

Editor's Note: As most of you surely know, ShitBegone Brand Toilet Paper is creating a huge buzz in two normally disparate worlds: art and PoopReporting. ShitBegone is art masquarading as commerce, and is succeeding in both worlds. (Check out our review of ShitBegone in PoopReport's Survey of...

In Sync: Comparing Our Poop Propensity -
Submitted by Dave
August 7, 2002, 17 Comments

Two weeks ago, Assblaster2000 and I engaged in an experiment: if we both eat the exact same food, will we poop the exact same poops? For three days, we kept poop diaries as we shared a diet. Although 300 miles seperates us, we can thank multinational chains for ensuring that we're eating the...

Piled Higher and Deeper: the Correlation
Submitted by Ryan Shaun Bake...
July 26, 2002, 7 Comments

Every year, countless innocent young minds enter an institution known as graduate school, with the goal of obtaining a "PhD". As many as half of them, however, do not successfully complete the requirements for a PhD and leave graduate school without one, their life an abject failure (Golde and...

In Sync: Comparing Our Poop Propensity
Submitted by Dave
July 19, 2002, 23 Comments

It's a very simple question: if people eat the same, will they crap the same? It started when AssBlaster2000, an uberpooper and regular forums contributor, noted: I have only ever shat once a day or even every other day, and I eat a lot for a woman. My turds are usually 6" long and 1-2" in...

Green Poop: The Implications Of Food Dye
Submitted by Dave J
July 3, 2002, 1,629 Comments

Editor's note: here's the short answer -- blue food coloring turns your poop green. Keep reading to find out more, and then peruse the many, many comments for corroboration. Since my freshman year in college (a small liberal arts college in northern Vermont), I've been fascinated with the...

Cloaca: Shit That Is Art
Submitted by Dave
June 20, 2002, 46 Comments

The grand irony of PoopReport.com is that it conceals genuine intellectual thought in the guise of stories about crap. For this reason, I was very excited by the recent Cloaca exhibit at The New Museum of Contemporary Art in NYC -- it used the guise of intellectual thought to get people to spend...

The Rich Are Laughing At Us: Urinetown,
Submitted by Dave
June 14, 2002, 7 Comments

All Broadway is abuzz with news of the 10 Tony nominations for Urinetown: The Musical. The surprise darling of The Great White Way, Urinetown chronicles a city in which private bathrooms have been banned due to water shortages -- and the monopoly running all the public bathrooms charges such...

Toilet Bowl Confessions: An Interview Wi
Submitted by Dave
May 17, 2002, 14 Comments

Editor's Note: As PoopReport grows, I think its important to reach out and see what our poop contemporaries are doing. We've met artists, musicians, and writers... today, we meet a filmmaker. Colin Powers is the writer and director of Toilet Bowl Confessions, a film that explores the simple...

Merda d'Artista, or, You Call That
Submitted by Sarah
April 11, 2002, 38 Comments

Digestion and excretion. Elimination of solid waste. Making number two. Taking a big ol' dump. The names for this natural bodily process are many, and for eons upon eons, humans have taken an inordinate amount of interest in their own shit production. Heck, even primates at the zoo are frequently...

Airline Toilets and Vacuum-Sealed Asses:
Submitted by Colon Bowell
February 14, 2002, 21 Comments

Editor's note: This article serves as resolution to Scientific Conjecture Regarding a Woman's Misfortune. As any self-respecting poopreport reader knows, a recent news story depicted the horrific ordeal of a woman whose buttocks became firmly stuck to an airline toilet seat as a result of the...

Defecation Imagery in American Science F
Submitted by Kyle K.
January 29, 2002, 7 Comments

Among the various literary genres, perhaps none proves such a fertile dumping ground for fecal imagery as science fiction. From Asimov to Zelazny, nearly every work of science fiction squeezes in its own often subtle (and, often, not-so-subtle) breed of excretory metaphors. An example of toilet...

Scientific Conjecture Regarding a Woman
Submitted by Dave
January 23, 2002, 23 Comments

It started when Matt forwarded this article to his friends: Flushed with Anger -- Sky Toilet Horror Tuesday January 22 8:58 AM ET OSLO (Reuters) - An American woman had no need to fasten her seatbelt on a flight from Scandinavia to the United States after a high-pressure vacuum flush sealed her...

Engrossing Literature: An Interview With
Submitted by Dave
January 18, 2002, 12 Comments

Greta Garbage couldn't have picked worse subjects to write about. Author of Greta Garbage's OUTRAGEOUS Bathroom Book and That's Disgusting: An Adult Guide to What's Gross, Tasteless, Rude, Crude & Lewd, Greta is one of the world's foremost curators of feculent factoids. Greta recently gave...

Pooper Or Plastic: The Debate Over Prope
Submitted by Dave
January 4, 2002, 16 Comments

Last week my co-worker Carolyn and I went for lunch at one of those hippie Mexican places with burritos the size of an overweight baby -- way too much food for the un-stoned human to eat. I, of course, cleaned my plate, despite the pain in my stomach. That's what I was taught to do. There are...

Ghost Poops, The Mystery Loaf, and Wormh
Submitted by Joe C.
December 6, 2001, 26 Comments

"When you drop a Ghost Poop: You know poop comes out, wipe....no poop, look in the toilet...no evidence of poop, where does it go?" -- Joe C, 11-23-01 Abstract My research has convinced me that there could be some sort of wormhole in the space-time continuum in which poop is free to move from...

Pooping On The Boot: A Revisionist Look
Submitted by Gabe
November 28, 2001, 2 Comments

PART IV: Poop And City Planning: Planning On A Lot More Poop Like many Old World citizens, Italians pride themselves in maintaining their heritage. Be it their cuisine, their buildings, or their outlook on body odor, the people of Italy want the whole world to know just how long their culture has...

Pooping On The Boot: A Revisionist Look
Submitted by Gabe
November 22, 2001, 11 Comments

PART II: Italian Attempts At Globalization: Pooping Alongside the Rest of Us Since the widespread use of mass production techniques made Anglo-Western goods of all shapes and sizes easy to find and economical to buy, the xenophobic Italian powers-that-be have exerted a concerted effort to keep...

Pooping On The Boot: A Revisionist Look
Submitted by Gabe
November 22, 2001, 0 Comments

PART III: Poop in the Renaissance: The Rebirth of Scatosculpture The term "scatosculpture" was first coined by me approximately 2 seconds ago, and has quickly evolved to describe sculpted masterpieces that depict poop or figures in the act of pooping. Scatosculpture can be traced back to early...

Pooping On The Boot: A Revisionist Look
Submitted by Gabe
November 21, 2001, 6 Comments

Italy has a long and interesting history. Thousands of years before uniting as a country, the boot-shaped peninsula was home to many disparate nation-states. Rome, Naples, Milan, Venice -- they all waged war to vie for power and each was able to maintain its own specific government, culture, even...

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