Do You iPoop?
There seem to be iPhone applications (apps) for everything these days, and the subject of poop humor is no exception. In case you happen to have an iPhone and you are a PoopReporter, here are some of Poop apps available.
iPoolish: Polish it Turd Polisher
This is just weird. I have no idea why someone would buy this app. You spend a few minutes rubbing your fingertip over the iScreen like an i-Diot:
Tweet Your Poop
With this app, you can Tweet your turds to Twitter by twiddling your two tapping thumbs over your touchpad. This app allows you to choose the color and quality of your turd before posting. Does anyone have this app? If so, what is meant by quality? That seems rather ambiguous.
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Poop the World
This app brings the world together, literally, by allowing people to send in the times and places that they poop to one database. Not only that, but the app allows you to use one of many interesting names for both the type and odor of your latest creation. As you record your stinkers, they are recorded in a trophy room where, upon completion of the list, they become available to you. Here’s a video to explain:
iPoop (version one)
If you wonder about your health, and you poop, this is an app for you. Categorizing your poop by color, consistency, and number of times per day will allow it to tell you a bit about yourself.
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Fowlplay: Poop on People
Fowlplay is an iGame where you get to be the pigeon for a change. Poop on people without flying into trees, and the game gets faster. The reviews of the game all mention above average graphics for an app game.
If it’s knowledge you seek, and that knowledge is how much toilet paper you might need for the burrito festering in your lower colon, this app can help. Choose the meal closest in description to what you ate, and the app gives you a weight and a plumbing recommendation.
Monkey Sheep Poop Fight
Choose to be either a poop-flinging monkey or a turd-chucking sheep in this game. The monkey can move faster, but the sheep has great aim. Whatever. It beats looking at the guy across from you on the train who can’t stop picking his nose and actually thinks no one notices.
This app is my favorite. Ever wonder just how much you’re getting paid to crap? With this app, you can find out. All you have to is simply input your yearly salary and hit Enter. If you have the internet connected on your phone, this app allows you to upload the results to Facebook – that is, as long as your boss isn’t on your friends list.
There are more apps available online; one of the poop at work apps computes an hourly wage instead of a yearly salary, for instance. With poop songs to listen to, poop jokes to read, and a variety of fart apps to choose from, there’s enough poop humor to keep you entertained no matter where you are or how long it will take you to get there.