what to do with used colostomy bags

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j 1000+ pointsk 500+ pointsl 100+ pointsm 1+ points - Newb
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JoyofLife asks:

I have a friend... let's call her Hag. She has this awful fecal drainage. She uses her bag to collect it during the day. Kinda like a Hagbag, but very gross!

What can she do, besides putting her used bags on eBay?





Dear JoyofLife,

Lets see... How about just throwing them out?

That may work.

Please be advised that I am only a Poonurse. I am NOT a medical doctor. Any advice I give should be taken moderate skepticism. Please consult a REAL medical doctor if you feel you have a serious medical condition.

-- Poonurse

Poonurse is an RN with 25 years experience in labor and delivery. Her qualifications include seeing a lot of poop, and owning a computer. Also, she works in Michigan, which she calls the asshole of the universe, so that's another bit of credibility.

Got a question for her?












14 Comments on "what to do with used colostomy bags"

The Shit Volcano's picture
Comment Quality Moderatorh 3000+ points

Leave them in the parking lot of a grocery store. That's what the old people in Melbourne, FL do.

I found Jesus! He was behind the sofa the whole time!

Fart Poopie's picture

You can substitute them for sand bags during flood season.

The Shit Volcano's picture
Comment Quality Moderatorh 3000+ points

I think they tried that in New Orleans. Idiot mayor!

I found Jesus! He was behind the sofa the whole time!

Double Flush's picture
k 500+ points

Then again, some sick and deranged people would actually BUY something like that on ebay. Personally, I would simply throw them in the trash can along with whatever else. Problem solved, no need to deal with others' comments.

_______
Practicing the ancient Chinese art of double flushing... because sometimes, a single flush just isn't enough.

[Insert witty banter here]

KeepOnCrappin's picture
k 500+ points

Common sense, right?
I'd throw them out.

_______
"KOC -- the Cool Crapper" - Rat Droppings

"KOC -- the Cool Crapper" - Rat Droppings

HagBag's picture

Admit it, JoL. You covet my colostomy bags for your own devices, as in fertilizing your tomatoes and other garden delicacies. We know the secret of the Great Pumpkin is great compost-and mine's the best. Keep your dirty mitts off my pooh-bags. Kisses!

GottaGoGirl's picture
i 2000+ points

I hate to display my ignorance, but what's a hag bag?

"It's hip to be square.--Huey Lewis

healthy 1's picture
j 1000+ points

GGG, a hag bag is a nick name for a crabby old ladies purse. In this case, the hag bag is slang for a colostomy bag.

What to do with the bags. If you get enough of them, you can put them in the back of a vehicle, for added traction in the winter. They work even better than sand bags.
_______
"-55F, a new record low? Nope, thermometer went bad. Looks like -50F still stands"

"Two percent of the population think; three percent of the population think they think, and 95 percent of the population would rather die than think."

Anonymous Coward's picture

What would happen if you jumped on them? Would it be similar to when you jump on a tube of toothpaste?
And what if you were wearing a colostomy bag and you rolled over on it in your sleep? Wouldnt that sort of suck?

ChiefThunderbutt's picture
PoopReport of the Year AwardComment Content ModeratorComment Quality Moderatorf 5000+ points

AC....It would be much worse to roll over on your bedmates colostomy bag!

Contrary to healthy 1's comment back on 01.07.2007 I believe the correct definition of a 'hag bag' is the bag that you place over the head of a rather unattractive women before you retire to the bedroom. When I was a child the neighborhood dogs used to put a bag over my head and then hump my leg.


_______
Eat chilies and feel the burn!!

If I had two faces do you think I'd be wearing this one?

Waseem.Khokhar@dlapiper.com's picture

My wife empties contents of her used bags in the curry pot makes a great dish with aubergines.

daphne's picture
PoopReport of the Year AwardSite AdminComment Content ModeratorComment Quality Moderatore 6000+ points

That's disgusting.

I hate aubergines.


_______
.....hugging bunnies since 1969
www.daphneszoo.com

.....hugging bunnies since 1969
www.daphneszoo.com

ChiefThunderbutt's picture
PoopReport of the Year AwardComment Content ModeratorComment Quality Moderatorf 5000+ points

Replace the disgusting aubergines with squash and you might have a dish.


_______
Eat chilies and feel the burn!!

If I had two faces do you think I'd be wearing this one?

sittingpretty's picture
Comment Quality Moderatori 2000+ points

What is aubergines?br>_______
...And their flesh like dung. Zeph. 1:17

...And their flesh like dung. Zeph. 1:17

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