blackish-brownish-whitish lumps

PoopReport of the Year AwardComment Quality Moderatorj 1000+ pointsk 500+ pointsl 100+ pointsm 1+ points - Newb

Aaron asks:

Well i dont know what it is but i want to make sure.. Between my ass crack on the side kinda inside of my ass a little bit not very far but you do have to spread it to see.. but theres like 3 little blackish-brownish with a little white lumps or somthing on 1 side of my ass crack inside.. 1 is kinda big and the other 2 are small..i have no clue what it is.. my ass crack doesnt really ich alot.. it does sweat alot kinda.. any help or pictures of ideas of what you may think it is would help out alot...

Dear Aaron,

First of all, how did you ever get into a position to see this to begin with? Are you a contortionist?

Anyway, as for what the spots are, they are probably pilonidal cysts.

A pilonidal cyst is a cyst at the bottom of the tailbone (coccyx) that can become infected and filled with pus. Most doctors believe they are caused by an ingrown hair.

Thanks for asking Motherload!

Motherload is a Certified Nurse Assistant as well as an IBS sufferer, which means she knows a lot about poop. Got a question for her? Ask it here.

16 Comments on "blackish-brownish-whitish lumps"

Anonymous Coward's picture

Could be genital warts.

delusional pooper's picture
m 1+ points - Newb

My cousin Norman had exactly the same stuff; he died soon after discovering them.

Believe in the joy of shitting!

Believe in the joy of shitting!

DungDaddy's picture
Comment Quality Moderatorj 1000+ points

Seriously, I'm with DP. You are dead meat.

mapoopsalot's picture
m 1+ points - Newb

My dad had a pilonidal cyst as a young man. He had it removed and lived a very long life into his mid 80's.

Double Flush's picture
k 500+ points

I would definitely go and get this checked out. However, sometimes fuzz can come off your clothes and get caught in any hair you have, so try taking another look after a thorough cleaning.

Damnit, someone stole my signature!

[Insert witty banter here]

Thunderbox's picture
PoopReport of the Year AwardComment Quality Moderatorj 1000+ points

I`ve travelled in Africe a lot, and it sounds like you`re developing a case of butt goitres. These are usually on the neck or throat and come to the size of a smallish melon, just hanging there.

It would seem that you`ve caught a new variant of goitre, maybe from a foreign girl or ladyboy.

I would suggest investing in old ladies pants to support and give room to your new friends.

Advice - take up pipe smoking and wearing large women`s dresses.

The voice of sanity

Bunga Din's picture
j 1000+ points

This could also be anal warts, you haven't been having bum sex with toads have you?

daphne's picture
PoopReport of the Year AwardSite AdminComment Content ModeratorComment Quality Moderatore 6000+ points

I think a few members of the Peanut Gallery are enjoying the hell out of Labor Day. I really like the Peanut Gallery at times.

Aaron, I am curious, what do you do for a living? Do you sit alot or sweat alot?
.....hugging bunnies since 1969

.....hugging bunnies since 1969

Fart Poopie's picture
j 1000+ points

I'm surprised no one suggested they might be poop encrusted butt zits.

SamDamnit's picture
Comment Quality Moderatorj 1000+ points

This is obviously the early stages of the ebola virus. Soon, your nipples will start bleeding and your insides will melt down in to a bloody soup that pours out of each orifice. I suggest that you buy an eight ball of coke and some high priced hookers.
Sir SamDamnit!
The Emir of Crapistan

The Emir of Crapistan

Anomalous Coward's picture
k 500+ points

If you have a lesion, or growth, or fugging ugly protuberance (aside from your nose) that causes you concern - get to a doctor. This is basic common sense. For all you know it could be alien invaders from Uranus.

Aaron's picture

Thanks for your guys concerns but i did more researching and looking and im 99% its
prolapsed hemorrhoids. its not a bunch of them its just 1 lump to be exact.
THis is info i found and i also seen a picture.. now off to the doctor to get rid of it..
# This occurs when the internal hemorrhoids swell and then extend through the anus.

# You then can feel the hemorrhoids, at your anus, from the outside.

# Many times you can gently push the hemorrhoids back through the anus and solve the problem

baron von crapalot's picture
k 500+ points

INGROW HAIR!!!????? HOLY SHIT! Im off to get my ass waxed.

Did I just fart?.... Oh shit! NO!!

I hope to god I've just sat in a Shepard's pie.

Squat-n-leaveit's picture
Comment Quality Moderatork 500+ points

Get a magnifying glass. Check and see if they are holding heir noses. Could be ticks.

Poo Commando's picture
m 1+ points - Newb

"Most doctors believe they are caused by an ingrown hair."

Hehe, funny how most doctors "believe"...what, no one wants to dissect one of these pustules just to make sure??


prarie doggin's picture
PoopReport of the Year AwardComment Quality Moderatorg 4000+ points

Aaron, nothing to worry about. You're just growing a tail.

Post new comment

  • Allowed HTML tags: s:62:"<em> <strong> <cite> <code> <ul> <ol> <li> <dl> <dt> <dd> <br>";
  • Lines and paragraphs break automatically.

More information about formatting options

This question is for testing whether you are a human visitor and to prevent automated spam submissions.
Enter the characters shown in the image.
To prevent automated spam submissions leave this field empty.