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Poop Where You Vote
Submitted by ChiefThunderbutt
December 11, 2010, 3 Comments

If you are an elected official then we all know that you are full of shit, but we expect you to occasionally ease the internal pressure by letting a little of it out. And even though we know that most of your decisions will stink we expect a certain degree of bodily cleanliness, and we think you...

Doggy DooDoo Decries the Dark
Submitted by ChiefThunderbutt
November 24, 2010, 5 Comments

Having a little trouble reading the fine print in that contract as you sit in the doggy park? Need to shed a little more light on the subject? Don't worry, just take a tip from conceptual artist Matthew Mazotta: Toss a nice greasy snack to your nearest canine friend, then wait a while. Matt is...

Illinois Woman Hopping Mad After Steppin
Submitted by ChiefThunderbutt
October 19, 2010, 6 Comments

Susan Miller was sitting on her apartment balcony in suburban Chicago, minding her own business, when she was alerted to the fact that a neighbor’s cat had miscalculated a leap and inadvertently escaped to the great al fresco. Being an animal lover, Susan immediately decided to attempt to return...

Crappy Compensation: What's a Fair
Submitted by Thunderbox
September 22, 2010, 8 Comments

It`s those Antipodeans again, I`m afraid. An unfortunate tale from Wellington, New Zealand, involving a meter reader, a turd, and a plastic bag. The un-named meter man, now sacked, was caught short while taking a reading in the locked entrance way of Errol Anderson`s apartment block. The meter man...

Poo-Sniffing Rodents May Slow Pandemics
Submitted by ChiefThunderbutt
September 17, 2010, 4 Comments

Here's some good news for all of you mouse haters out there: Science has proven that these minuscule creatures can be trained to sniff out poop from birds that carry, and transmit, the dreaded "avian flu". The next time you detect one of these furry little disease-detecting rodents in your home,...

Oregon Residents Knee-Deep in Goose Poop
Submitted by ChiefThunderbutt
September 7, 2010, 7 Comments

There is nothing quite as gross as a lawn covered with goose poop. There are also fewer things more delicious than a properly roasted goose, which is one of the tastier members of the fowl family. Just check with any resident of the UK where, if I am not mistaken, the goose is much more popular...

Trashy Trollop Tells Tales of Turd Terro
Submitted by Blind Mullet
August 26, 2010, 7 Comments

Apparently, there's a young girlie who pretends to be a singer/dancer/entertainer, and she claims to indulge in acts of turd terrorism (and not even funny ones). As most Poop Reporters know, there are two main categories of turd terrorism. There's the gross, disgusting category – where poop is...

Whale Poop not Such a Bad Thing, Scienti
Submitted by ChiefThunderbutt
August 10, 2010, 5 Comments

Whale poop seems to be necessary for a smooth running environment. The massive bowel movements that our giant cetacean friends squirt into the ocean after having dined heavily on fish, krill, or squid are great fertilizers for aquatic plants that bind carbon molecules in the water for hundreds or...

Yobs Piss Off Shop Owner
Submitted by ChiefThunderbutt
August 6, 2010, 14 Comments

Gloucester, UK is on the way to being famous for something other than its renowned cheese. While the cheese has an odor, its smell cannot compare to the reek of stale urine that now emanates from the fire exit of the shoe shop managed by Shirley Smith on St. John's Lane in that fair city. The...

Pet Waste Disposal Employee Finds Bunch
Submitted by ChiefThunderbutt
July 19, 2010, 7 Comments

A pet poop cleanup worker in St. Louis recently saw what appeared to be money sticking out of a pile of one of his customer's dog's turds. Steve Wilson, an employee of Doody Calls Pet Waste, was unsure of what to do at first, but he decided upon gingerly removing the moolah from the feces,...

Doodie Requires Decomposition: Behold t
Submitted by Thunderbox
July 14, 2010, 8 Comments

An amazing fact in its own right is that Japan managed to manufacture five billion adult diapers and sell to its own population last year! But, now what? What are they going to do with all these horribly fecal-filled monstrosities? Behold -- the SFD Recycle System. This fine beast of a machine...

Brown Trout Obode Needlessly Cleaned Up
Submitted by ChiefThunderbutt
July 2, 2010, 11 Comments

California is spending $30,000 to clean up something that may not really need cleaning up. It seems that some dastardly person has dumped old tires and commodes into the waters off Malibu. This is actually done intentionally in other parts of the world including in the coastal waters of the...

Big Porcelain Bill Goes Over Badly in Be
Submitted by ChiefThunderbutt
June 29, 2010, 8 Comments

Planning on taking your next vacation in Asia? Does China possibly top your list of popular destinations? If so, should you visit the Great Wall, the Forbidden City, or perhaps just spend your time in a newly constructed luxury crapper in the town of Jinan in eastern China's Shandong Provence?...

DNA Tracking Implemented to Catch Dog Ow
Submitted by ChiefThunderbutt
June 23, 2010, 6 Comments

The members of a ritzy condominium in Baltimore recently came very close to some space-age policing dreamed up by their governing board. It seems that the Scarlett place condo board of governors decided that there was just too much doggy poop laying about, and some means of enforcing the rule that...

Bus Driver Caught Taking Dumps on the Bu
Submitted by ChiefThunderbutt
June 9, 2010, 17 Comments

It seems that a neighborhood in Milwaukee had enough of a poop dumping school bus driver. On several occasions the driver was spotted and video-taped, squatting in her bus and obviously shitting in a bag, which she later deposited at curbside for others to deal with. When the videos were handed...

Woman Dies From Piece of Toilet Brush Lo
Submitted by ChiefThunderbutt
May 26, 2010, 22 Comments

A young British woman has met a tragic end, literally. Cindy Corton, a mother of one child, died during an operation that attempted to remove a six inch sliver of a toilet brush handle that had become embedded in one of her buttocks five years earlier. It seems that Mrs. Corton, while in a state...

Better Marriage Blanket has Bad Farts Co
Submitted by daphne
May 21, 2010, 20 Comments

Montreal Gal sent me a heads up last week about a blanket designed to absorb farts. According to the website of the Better Marriage Blanket, you don't have to be woken up at night anymore if your spouse or significant other lets nocturnal gas bombs go at will. Constructed of "the same type of...

Cashmere Toilet Paper is for Assholes
Submitted by daphne
April 2, 2010, 40 Comments

A vast expanse of rough terrain stretching over five hundred thousand miles covers fifty percent of the border between northern China and lower Mongolia. This unforgiving landscape, one dominated by harsh winds, extreme temperatures, and inhabited by few people -- and fewer animal species -- is...

Peepoo Bags Offer Possible Relief to the
Submitted by IBS NO MORE
March 25, 2010, 7 Comments

In an effort to solve one of today's biggest global problems, a Swedish entrepreneur has developed a single-use, biodegradable, portable toilet apparatus called the Peepoo Bag. With a cost of under three cents per bag, he wants to distribute these in areas of the world where there are no toilets,...

Flushing Bad Karma Down the Pan
Submitted by Thunderbox
March 9, 2010, 8 Comments

In Gunma prefecture, close to Tokyo in central Japan, lies a temple that was once an asylum for women who wanted to leave their husbands. In the old days before the nineteenth century, only men had the right to divorce. Mantokuji temple is now a museum dedicated to the history of divorce. It has...

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