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Ask Poopreport: Off My Schedule
Submitted by Spura
May 11, 2011, 6 Comments

I recently went on a two-week vacation, and ever since I returned my bowel habits have changed. I used to go twice a day, almost everyday -- once in the morning after I ate or drank coffee, and once after I get home from work. While on vacation I mostly only went daily, partly because we did not...

Ask Poopreport: Fleet Phospho Soda
Submitted by mrs phantomhive
May 6, 2011, 8 Comments

I've been suffering from constipation for three weeks now. The only movements I have had were aided by suppositories or enemas. Now my doctor has prescribed Lactulose, and I am afraid to take it. I have had a really bad adverse reaction to an oral laxative before. A few years ago I was told to...

Ask Poopreport: Oxidizing Poop
Submitted by Marcus
May 2, 2011, 21 Comments

I am a twenty-eight year old male and I have insanely large bowel movements probably because I eat mostly vegetarian diet foods… particularly granola. My bowel movements are bowel curlers. They drop in, break off, and loop around. Sometimes they break the water surface. Lately I have had...

Ask Poopreport: Extra Toilet Paper.
Submitted by HiddenBig
April 25, 2011, 14 Comments

Our office has eight people in it. Of all of us maybe three replenish the toilet paper. I am one of the three who used to. After Christmas I got caught in the bathroom with no toilet paper after a considerably large poo, so I waddled over to the paper towel dispenser and back to my stall, risking...

Ask Poopreport: Shirtless Pooping In Pub
Submitted by Baked Beans Baker
April 22, 2011, 20 Comments

My former boss told me that her husband takes his shirt off when he poops, even if he's in a public restroom stall. She says he sweats when he poops. She also says a female friend takes her shirt off when she poops (again, even in a public stall) because she needs to feel relaxed when she poops....

Ask Poopreport: Replacement for Wife?
Submitted by stinky888
April 19, 2011, 22 Comments

When I go to the thunder box I like to take my time, read a book, or just sit and think about life and all its complexities. Sometimes I can be in there for up to an hour, but my wife can't understand how I can stay in there for so long with the smell. She constantly nags me to come out, but she...

Ask Poopreport: Replacement for Beer?
Submitted by Anonymous
April 13, 2011, 14 Comments

I can't seem to poop without having a beer. I mean, I can poop a little bit, but to get a good poop out, I need to have some alcohol in my system. What can I replace beer with in order to get the same lovely effect?

Ask Poopreport: Bogarting the Toilet Pa
Submitted by Game Kid
April 4, 2011, 12 Comments

I share a bathroom with my two brothers. They don't replace the empty rolls of toilet paper that they leave when they go to the bathroom. I've forgotten to check out the roll at times and have been left with a dirty butt, hoping that no one sees me waddle out to the closet in the hall for another...

Ask Poopreport: Coach's Strange Be
Submitted by Senior Kid
March 30, 2011, 22 Comments

In January our basketball team took a bus another school to play an away game. The ride takes about half an hour, and a big part of that time is spent on the highway between our two towns. Coach rides with us and we go over plays while we drive to the game, and then we talk about mistakes or good...

Ask Poopreport: Flushing For Someone El
Submitted by marleyspoo
March 28, 2011, 27 Comments

Two weeks ago my sister-in-law dropped by with her four year-old daughter and six year-old son. They both drive me up the wall because they don't listen. My sister is seven years older than me, too, by the way, so I don't stand up for myself very well with her. She will always be the older...

Ask Poopreport: Poopy Breath?
Submitted by Tara Ann
March 17, 2011, 5 Comments

My gallbladder was removed in August. I still have bad pain in my upper stomach. I might have a condition that could send me into pancreatitis, but I am having trouble getting into see a specialist. The condition is called Sphincter of Oddi Dysfunction, which either presents as a narrowing of...

Ask Poopreport: My Butt Is Falling Out.
Submitted by athenivanidx
March 15, 2011, 14 Comments

Does anyone else feel "unwiped" after a poo, even after using half a roll of toilet paper? I do, and when I pull my pants up I get this sensation like my undies are sticking to the inside of my anus. It's so weird. A nd so gross. I didn't notice this too much until a few years ago. In fact, one...

Ask Poopreport: When Is It Heaviest?
Submitted by Devo Brown
February 17, 2011, 27 Comments

Does poop weigh more or less when it's inside the body? My theory is that it weighs less when it's inside the body because it is surrounded by so much liquid. Then once you poop it out, it would weigh more. Can you shed any light on this issue for me? Thanks!

Ask Poopreport: A Cautionary Tale
Submitted by daphne
February 15, 2011, 15 Comments

Dave recently forwarded an email to me from a woman asking for advice in regard to her nephew and his mother: So my sister, who heard Dr. Oz say that floating poop is the best poop, now thinks that her very large son, who has probably never seen a vegetable – let alone eat one – is healthy. He...

Ask Poopreport: How Do I Clean My Clothe
Submitted by kelshee
February 4, 2011, 15 Comments

Do you know how to get the smell of keriorrhoea (orange oil) from eating butterfish, or escolar, out of clothing? I've lost so much clothing! I don't know what to do anymore! Thank you!

Ask Poopreport: How Can I Stop Obsessive
Submitted by Jlynn
February 2, 2011, 18 Comments

I would like to say how happy I am that I found this sight, because my thing is I am literally stuck in my house. If I do leave I know where every bathroom is in my area. This need for my knowing the day’s bathroom mapping has been going on for four years now. It’s ruining my life to where I...

Ask Poopreport: Can I Stop Holding It In
Submitted by codywon
January 21, 2011, 12 Comments

When I was five I thought pooping hurt too much, so I held it in. Poop would squeeze out a little, anyway, so I'd wipe it up. Now I've gotten addicted holding it in, and I can't stop. I'm in high school. I don't know what to do!

Ask Poopreport: Why Does He Spend So Mu
Submitted by PooBear
January 11, 2011, 33 Comments

My husband poops for a full hour, usually twice per day. He drinks coffee and fruit juice every morning. He also eats a lot of fruit, too, so I know he doesn't do this because he's constipated; he just poops a ton and a half. He has to flush twice. What do I do? My husband spends his whole life...

Ask Poopreport: A-Choo!
Submitted by littlepoops
December 30, 2010, 10 Comments

OK, so here's the thing: Almost every time I take a shit, I sneeze uncontrollably. I'm wondering if there's something wrong with me or am I just sensitive to my own brand. Does anyone else have this problem?

Ask Poopreport: What Do I Tell Her?
Submitted by sprout
December 22, 2010, 15 Comments

My two year-old wants to know what poop taste like. What do I tell her?

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