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Ask PoopReport: A Poop Anomaly
Submitted by ChiefThunderbutt
July 20, 2015, 12 Comments

Our beloved Chief Thunderbutt asks today: I just had a very strange occurrence in my bathroom. I had no BM yesterday, which is highly unusual; so I was happy when the urge finally struck just as I was finishing today's evening meal. I hobbled--thanks to a gout attack in my left knee--to the...

Ask PoopReport: Does Lying Down Automat
Submitted by Anonymous
April 3, 2015, 9 Comments

An anonymous writer has the following question: I noticed something weird in the past few weeks. I think I'm farting without realizing it. When I go to bed, I lay in bed for a little bit and read. After half an hour or so, I go to the bathroom and get ready to turn out the lights and go to sleep...

Ask PoopReport: How Do I Find A Pooping
Submitted by Anonymous
February 5, 2014, 1 Comments

Today we received an email from someone who needs some advice. She wrote the following: I used to not poop but maybe 3 times a week. Soon after I diagnosed with PTSD, I started to gain weight. Didn't matter what I did. I kept gaining and now I can't loose the weight, which lead me to this...

Ask PoopReport: Son Needs Help Cleaning
Submitted by Anonymous
September 18, 2013, 3 Comments

A very sweet person wrote it today asking for help with him mother: My mum has dementia and depression. Psychiatrists tell me it is common for depressed dementia patients to play with their poop. She gets it under her nails and it is difficult to clean out by normal means as she is very sensitive...

Ask PoopReport: My Dad's Gallbladd
Submitted by Anonymous
September 6, 2013, 2 Comments

"Lily" has written in for help for her father: My father has colon cancer. When he went into surgery, the foolish doctors removed his gallbladder because it looked "distressed." Now he spends most of his time in the bathroom. He has found a guy on the internet who had the same problem, and...

Ask PoopReport: The Word Feces
Submitted by Anonymous
August 30, 2013, 2 Comments

"Bobo" wrote in with the following question: Dear Daphne and Poop Report, Where did the word feces or faeces come from? As far as I know, feces is from Latin. I took three years of Latin in high school, and our teacher, Father Shillen, often told us what the "dirty" words meant. He was a...

Ask PoopReport: My Stinky Shower
Submitted by Anonymous
August 10, 2013, 5 Comments

Today I have a question of my own! We live in a house build into the side of a hill. Our front door is on ground level in the front of the house, and to get to the back yard, one must go downstairs and out the back of the house. All of our bedrooms and two bathrooms are located downstairs, level...

Ask PoopReport: Stall-Clearing Tactic
Submitted by Anonymous
August 7, 2013, 5 Comments

Someone whose child may or may not be a future Poopreporter wrote in this weekend with a question that made me laugh out loud in spite of myself: Last night my daughter told me that she goes to great lengths to make people leave a public bathroom if she wants to poop, because she hates pooping to “...

Ask Poopreport: No Bathroom Break for E
Submitted by Anonymous
July 4, 2013, 5 Comments

A rather impressed young man asked a question about our nation's political system: I read that Texas Senator Wendy Davis filibustered for 11 hours [last] week in an attempt to stop the Texas Senate from voting on a bill. An article I read says she wasn't allowed to stop talking, lean on anything...

Ask Poopreport: Organic Apple Cider Vin
Submitted by Anonymous
May 31, 2013, 3 Comments

"Lydia" sent in this email: For the past couple of weeks my bowel movements have been gray. I told a friend and she told me to buy some unfiltered, unpasteurized apple cider vinegar and drink a few tablespoons a day. I did this, and crazy enough, my bowel movements because brown again. After...

Ask Poopreport: Got Sick On My Own Resta
Submitted by Anonymous
March 20, 2013, 4 Comments

After a rather horrific ride on the Porcelain Express, "Stew" asks for advice: Dear PoopReport, I work in a restaurant as a waiter. We are allowed to eat for free at the end of the night if something is left over. If nothing is left over, we can eat for half-price. Last night, some soup was left...

Ask Poopreport: Can You Help Me Stop Clo
Submitted by Anonymous
January 15, 2013, 16 Comments

An anonymous lady-ma'am writes in: I am an athletic girl with average weight, but I can't stop clogging my toilet. It is embarrassing me to make my family plunge it so often. I already do a poop flush and a TP flush, but my poop is just too big. Is there anything I can do that will make it...

Ask Poopreport: How Do I Avoid Pooping O
Submitted by Anonymous
January 2, 2013, 18 Comments

A shameful pooper is in our midst: I have a question for tips on holding in poop. I am going on a short, three-day vacation to my friend's house and was wondering if it would be safe for me to hold it in. I normally go every day, but on second day but the urge isn't too bad. Please leave tips...

Ask Poopreport: Why Won't My Mom J
Submitted by Anonymous
December 20, 2012, 3 Comments

A frustrated young adult writes in: My mom is kind of incontinent. She poops herself about twice a month during the drive home. I asked her to start buying diapers, and she said she didn't need them. Um, yes she does. What can I say to her to get her to realize she should be wearing them? P.S...

Ask Poopreport: My Dog's Annoying H
Submitted by Anonymous
December 14, 2012, 6 Comments

A fellow animal lover writes in about his dog's annoying habit: This is about my dog, not me. Since it involves poop maybe you can help me out anyway. My dog is a 40-pound mutt-type dog. He looks like a beagle mix. He is house-trained and is a real good dog except for two bad habits he has....

Ask Poopreport: Our Annual Notice On Med
Submitted by Anonymous
December 8, 2012, 7 Comments

Someone with a fake email address wrote this in: Hi. I have a problem that when I poop there two to three drops of bright blood. This has been happening for the last three days. What should I do to get rid of this [issue]? And the most important think is I don't want to show my ass to doctor...

Ask Poopreport: Am I Recovering From My
Submitted by Anonymous
December 1, 2012, 3 Comments

Blitz,who just had surgery, wrote to us today. If anyone had an appendectomy, please chime in! Hello everyone. Hope you're all pooping well! I had a laparoscopic appendectomy three days ago, and I've been on a few pain killers and antibiotics since then. I started eating yesterday, but I have...

Ask Poopreport: There's An Undigest
Submitted by Anonymous
November 30, 2012, 4 Comments

"Cathy" asks: Today,after going Number Two, I noticed something in my stool. It was a small, green, and shaped like a capsule. I take pills in morning, every morning, and I think that this is what I saw. Why did it not dissolve in my body? Did I get the full effect from that pill?

Ask Poopreport: Covert Toilet Paper?
Submitted by Anonymous
November 27, 2012, 6 Comments

I always want to post questions from young people, because they don't always feel comfortable asking for help from their own guardians or peers. A young person asks the following: Dear Poopreport, Our school toilet paper is awful. Crazy, but I am almost sure it gives me a rash. I'm a girl, which...

Ask Poopreport: I Have A Stinky, Dirty,
Submitted by Anonymous
November 19, 2012, 10 Comments

"Hooty" wrote in with a concern: OK, Ive had this problem for years. It started only in public places; when I pooped, the dry, cheap toilet paper wasn't enough to get me clean, and my ass cheeks would be stuck together for the rest of the day. Eventually I had to shit at home, and I had to use...

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